March 19th - Annotating Your Story

The story...

As a teacher, I encouraged students to write in the margins of their textbooks.  "Write your key 'learnings' in your own words . . . Internalize what you've learned . . . Write actionable statements . . . Record what you're taking away from this life investment."  Sadly many students were hesitant to write in their book.  Why?  Some believed that their thoughts were inferior to the authors.  Some were told not to deface library books.  Some wanted to resell the book and receive more money for a "like new" book.  Some never learned the annotating process for more effectively studying, learning, and applying.

A guy I respected, told me that it saddened him that people attended church "sermons" and didn't record what was important to them.  I agreed and decided to record my key points on a spiral bound set of notecards each week - I also included a sketch that reminded me of my key point(s).  This continued for a few years - it certainly helped me engage and review what I received.  I especially appreciated the sketches.  Then, a pastor was leaving the church and I was asked to collect a dozen of these cards that I might share with the pastor as a bit of memorabilia.  I was surprised that none of my note cards were appropriate for sharing with the community.  They meant much to me but would clearly be misconstrued by some church members.

My son's church thoughts on 3/03/96

The only church in town would provide the opportunity for people to walk side-by-side within the will of God.  This would include intentional learning and personal growth activities with the freedom to choose.  What joy to think of my son imagining that great afternoon when he'd be free from the church building and able to get out there and live - I'm glad I surrendered my note pad to him that day.

Just for today...

"I will make this day a happy one, for I alone can determine what kind of day it will be." One Day at a Time (p. 79)

"I don't know what is best for others because I don't know the lessons that God is offering them . . . Nine times out of ten, I am focusing on someone else to avoid looking at something in my own life."  Courage to Change (p. 79)

March 18th - Groupthink versus Truth

The story...

Solomon Asch conducted a conformity experiment to test the phenomena that's often referred to as groupthink.  In this study, only 25% of the participants would not go along with group consensus when evaluating which line length was a match.  

Reference & Comparison Card Pair - Wikipedia 5/18/24

Personally, I've often experienced the pain of being in that quartile who maintained their integrity when the group's going the other way - "it's just the way I am."  I assume that when the issues are more complex, than assessing the length of lines, the percentage decreases significantly.  Groupthink often results in people going where they don't wanna go - maybe nobody.

Within the only church in town, I hope that God's revealed Word would be the standard for measuring line length.  And, I hope that the grace, love and mercy offered by God, to us in Christ, would be extended amongst community members - freedom from the tyrannical rule of self.  Then, people might have a solid rock foundation for measuring truth - working out a life of integrity, characterized by love, amongst all their groups.

Just for today...

"I can lower my expectations of others and myself, and choose to be happy with progress rather than perfection."  Hope for Today (p. 78)

"I've spent so much time and energy trying to help those who didn't want it, that the opportunity  to make a welcome contribution to someone else's well being is precious to me." Courage to Change (p. 78)

"I will not look for a scapegoat to excuse my own faults."  One Day at a Time (p. 78)

"We must be true inside, true to ourselves, before we can know a truth that is outside us."  No Man Is an Island - Thomas Merton

March 17th - "Live and Let Live"

The story...

"Live and let live" is a life giving saying that suggests that we mind our own business and allow others the dignity and respect to live their own lives.  This frees us up from the burdens of "trying" to live out other people's lives - a burden that was never ours to carry.

My house has a deck out back with floodlights mounted under the eaves.  I enjoy working there when the weather's nice - the floodlight is above my head.  In the spring, invariably, a robin will attempt to build a nest above the flood light.  It was my habit to remove the nest, in various stages of build, three or even four times, before they gave up and moved elsewhere.  In 2021, I decided to practice "live and let live" and accommodate the robin.  I moved my "work" chair and endured the momma's chirping as she instinctually protected her chicks.  We even replanned gatherings that'd need the deck space.  Embarrassingly, I bragged about this good deed to all who would listen - "oh... what a proud man I can be."  One day, when the chicks were about ready to leave the nest, I witnessed a barred owl swoop down to the nest and swallow all the chicks.  My emotions ran deep.

What's the moral of the story?  Kill the barred owls!  Please don't, I love 'em.  Two of them are hooting "who cooks for you" as I write.  Do you "live and let live" at the risk of hurt and pain?  For me, I'll continue to "live and let live" but I'm also going to remove even the first twig from that lamp - I know better.  The barred owls in the woods are real.

Would the people of the only church in town be allowed the freedom to live out their own lives with dignity and respect?  I hope the answer is yes. Surely, we all need to be heard and  occasionally helped along our way.  Yet the risk of allowing people the freedom to live out their own lives is worth it.  Who knows what might happen as God works through the people of the only church in town.

Just for today...

"Before anyone else can pick up the ball, I need to be willing to drop it."   Hope for Today (p. 77)

"Difficult situations often bring out qualities in us that otherwise might not have risen to the surface, such as courage, faith, and our need for one another." Courage to Change (p. 77)

March 16th - Obsessive Thoughts

 The story...

"It's okay to let bad ideas land in your head but it's not okay to let them build a nest there."  I don't know when I heard this cliché but I do remember it.  I'm capable of renumerating, or continuously thinking about, an emotional triggered "issue" for too long.  This obsessive thinking can drive me into a mode where I think that I need to fix, manage, or control the issue(s).  Even when I'm distracted or move my energy toward another direction, it can be tempting to pick the thoughts up again.  Endlessly juggling them in my mind.  At those times, we're not free to choose a better life-giving alternative.  If free, we might experience fruit like: love, joy, peace, patience, happiness, and even joy. 

Personally, these obsessive thought patterns are negatively correlated with the degree that I'm walking humbly with God.  The more that I'm obsessively thinking, the less I'm thinking about, and relating rightly and honestly with, God and other people too.

Have I complete victory over obsessive thinking?  No.  Yet, I do recognize that obsessive state of mind and more quickly return to that right relation with God - the relationship-fruit bearing cycle is restored.  

Here are a few techniques I learned to better deal with obsessive thinking:

1. Say to yourself: "You've four minutes to tell me the truth about the situation - then it's over."  I'm frequently more aware of the situation reality, and my part in it, after the four minutes.
2. Literally brush the imagined issue off each of your shoulders as if they were bugs.
3. Kneel down and pray related truths from God's Word, about you, and the situation too.  Then spend and equal amount of time quietly and attentively listening.

The only church in town idea doesn't provide the opportunity for people to go to another church or split the church when obsessively focused on trouble.  The leaders, formal and informal, would naturally go to technique three, first individually and then as community.

Just for today...

"Acceptance means simply admitting there are things we cannot change.  Accepting them puts an end to our futile struggles and frees our thought and energy to work on things that can be changed." One Day at a Time (p. 76)

"When I obsessed, I hurt myself.  I drove myself to madness - insane thoughts and ideas - by trying to fix or control that which I have no power."  Hope for Today (p. 76)

March 15th - I'm OK, You're OK

The story...

In 1967, psychiatrist Thomas Anthony Harris published the book "I'm Okay - You're Okay."  It was a bestseller in the early 1970s.  It introduced the idea that a person's psychological state can shift situationally.  The three states were easy to understand and remember: Parent, Child and Adult.  Parent is like a mix of all that you heard and saw parents and adults do and say when you were a child.  Adult is that more independent person who has adapted to, and developed some control over, their environment.  This was a helpful model for me.  For example, many parents want to work out an adult-adult relationship with their adult children.

What does a good adult-to-adult relationship look like in the only church in town?  Would all the people be valued and treated with dignity and respect - treated as equals?  This seems to be justified by the USA's Declaration of Independence (1776):

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness"

I suppose that the problems are with those persons that do NOT behave, look, think or believe what we or I do - the exceptions.  How do I relate to adults who are different from me?  Personally, I think we can go a long way by beginning every relationship with one word in mind - RESPECT.

What season of life might the child best be related to as an adult in the only church in town?  Jewish boys and girls receive their Bar or Bat Mitzvah at the age of 12.  There seems to be many advantages of treating a teenager as an adult.  Their teenage season of life might be a time to practice giving and receiving adult-to-adult interactions.  If the alternative Parent-Child relationship stays in place, the rebels rebel and the passive are left to be led along like by a ring in their nose - these are the extremes yet often ring true.  I expect that being treated like, and behaving like, an adult would be a good place to come from when learning about who I am, where I'm going, and how to get there.  Yes, that was a definition of wisdom worked into that last sentence.

Just for today...

"I came to see how, as a child, I had played a role in creating the dynamics of my family. Not knowing how to manage uncomfortable feelings, I tried to stuff them deep down inside, but they didn't go away. Instead, they led me to behave in ways that perpetuated the feelings."  Hope for Today (p. 73)

"When I behave self-righteously, I'm the one who suffers - I separate myself from my fellow human beings, focus on others, and keep busy with hateful and negative thoughts."  Courage to Change (p. 73)

March 14th - A Journey of Faith

The story...

The preacher said: "If you aren't 100% sure of your salvation then you've got a big problem that you need to deal with."   He said this frequently and it bothered me every time.  Why?  I'm a conversationalist who asked about and heard other conceptions of God.  I remember believing in the gospel, during a Baptist outreach, when I was about seven.  However, I also rationally understood how the whole construct might've been worked out to help people deal with their fear of pain and death.  Wouldn't the fear of chaos motivate men to create a religion to control the masses?

I'm not sure what the process was, but one day I fully believed and stopped entertaining doubts - began more humbly and honestly walking with God in a "right' relationship.  I'm not sure whether it was an act of my will, powered by the Spirit of God, an experiment, or something worked out in prayer.  I do know that I fully believe God's Word now as opposed to rationally considering and evaluating each idea before "I" make "my" decision.  I hope that my current faith is more like the faith of Abraham - God's friend.

I struggled to find a picture that might best relate to faith.  I chose this bolt head that helped secure the bed of my old truck to it's rusty frame. If you've worked on old cars you learned that you'll find a way to get that seized bolt out even when it appears that there is "no way."  Fretting or thoughts of quitting don't help.  I was so thankful that I was able to grind this one off - I keep it as a reminder to trust the process and to remember past victories.

How might the only church in town work out their faith together and individually?  Preaching, teaching, praising, worshiping, communion, eating, serving, loving, helping, building, listening, sharing, caring, and likely most important - trusting in the will and hand of God.  The faith journey may start in a moment like Don and Betty had at their son's camp.  Their sin and the consequences are easy for the viewer to see yet they don't appear to really know what's going on -  a curse, the law of sin and death, working it's way out in people who were created for something better.

Just for today...

"If we do finally ask for God's help, we must do so with absolute confidence. It is fruitless to take back into our own hands the problem which our powerlessness forced us to turn over to Him." One Day at a Time (p. 74)

"It stands to reason that a change in us will be a force for good that will help the entire family." Courage to Change (p. 74)

March 13th - Our stories

The story...

Jesus taught through parables to both subtly teach and deliver tough messages indirectly.  I remember stories and love to share them - yes, I am a "story teller." I ponder stories that don't make sense to me. Movies with poor or unreasonable story lines . . . "ugh." 

Sometimes life experiences don't make sense, the related thoughts linger on until I reach some sort of conclusion.  Hours later I find myself saying: "That's what they were trying to tell me!"   I must miss most of the messages that I was intended to receive - story helps.

A friend and I watched almost all of the Seinfeld TV series episodes.  Each of the episodes were stories about common events with humorous way of looking at them.  When bringing a gift to an event, my friend will often say: "who is going to carry in the 'big salad'?"  We laugh when remembering the uncomfortable situation that the Seinfeld story embedded in our minds.  These common stories seem to help us communicate more quickly and succinctly as friends do.  I expect that friends share a common set of life stories that contain much of the history and meaning of their relationship.  It'd be more difficult to express yourself to another person without these common reference points.

Commonly understood stories can set the groundwork for sharing, more precisely and accurately, bigger or more complex ideas.  These bigger ideas are related to bigger questions that people like me have a hard time ignoring or accepting simple solution{s) to the questions they beg.

The only church in town would have stories from: scripture, the full-group, the sub-group, and the individual members too. This fuller set of stories help make more sense of life, God, people, and me too.  I'm thankful that I've attended the same church for a long period of time.  Yes, the only church in town would have long-term relationships.  No more church splits or church hopping?

Just for today...

"I came to see how, as a child, I had played a role in creating the dynamics of my family. Not knowing how to manage uncomfortable feelings, I tried to stuff them deep down inside, but they didn't go away. Instead, they led me to behave in ways that perpetuated the feelings."  Hope for Today (p. 73)

March 12th - Value of Attitude

The story...

It seemed that most people knew and valued Chuck Swindoll's statement on attitude - it was often posted on bulletin boards.  It seemed timeless yet something appears to have replaced it.  I wonder what that could be?

"This may shock you, but I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day-to-day basis is my choice of attitude. It is more important than my past, my education, my bankroll, my successes or failures, fame or pain, what other people think of me, or say about me, my circumstances, or my position. The attitude I choose keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there's no barrier too high, no valley too deep, no dream too extreme, no challenge too great for me.

Yet we must admit that we spend more of our time concentrating and fretting over the things that can't be changed than we do giving attention to the one that we can change, our choice of attitude. Stop and think about some of the things that suck up our attention and energy, all of them inescapable: the weather, the wind, people's action and criticisms, who won or lost the game, delays at airports or waiting rooms, x-ray results, gas and food costs.

Quit wasting energy fighting the inescapable and turn your energy to keeping the right attitude. Those things we can't do anything about shouldn't even come up in our minds; the alternative is ulcers, cancer, sourness, depression.

Let's choose each day and every day to keep an attitude of faith and joy and belief and compassion."

Thank you Pastor Swindoll

The only church in town would offer the best reasons for having a good attitude in all circumstances - every day.

Just for today...

"Negative thinking is a destructive force, but for me it's a way of life. When I feel tired, sick, bored, or stressed, I tend to focus on what's wrong. Sometimes I'm unhappy with myself or others. Sometimes I don't like my circumstances. Whether I complain aloud or suffer in silence, a negative attitude invites self-pity and discontent."  Hope for Today (p. 72)

"Detachment with love means that I stop depending upon what others do, say, or feel to determine my own well-being or to make my decisions."  Courage for Today (p. 72)

March 11th - Try or commit?

The story...

I expect that I should give credit for this "learning" to the person who showed me.  However, somebody shared it with him and who knows where it originated.  

The scenario, you ask for someone in the group to commit to completing an assignment.  They respond that they'll "try" to have it done by next Monday.  You take a dollar bill from your wallet and present it in front of them and you say: "try to take this dollar bill."  They pull it out of your hand and you say "No, I said 'try' to take it out of my hand - you actually took it out of my hand."  The receiver may say "huh?" and you repeat the exercise with them a few times before they internalize the idea.  "Try" means that you may or may not accomplish the task and have made no commitment.  Teams work best when people will to do what they say.  I frequently facilitated meetings where people, who were tempted to "waffle" on a commitment, would change their mind when I merely reached for my wallet and they recalled the value of commitment.

"Try to take this from my hand."

I expect that the only church in town would be filled with people who represent the full community.  And, each would be at a different stage of their lives. Together, they'd have all they need to work out the will of God for them, their church, and their community - trusting God with the outcomes.  Each would grow working side by side towards a common aim.  Rather than try, they'd work out their faith together in actualities.  Each person safely in Christ and Christ working out good works through them.

Just for Today...

"My friend and I resolve that in the future we will try less, accept more, and let go of our impatience, self-criticism, and self-hatred.  We take a deep breath and say, "Help me, God."  Courage to Change (p. 71)

"Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor; for if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up!" Ecclesiastics 4:9,10 (NASB)

March 10th - Everybody singing

The story...

The scene was from the risers in my seventh-grade choir room.  The leader said: "Rommel, you don't sing as good as you think you do."  I was crushed and have generally avoided public singing since then.  I don't recall ever hearing a recording of my singing.  I do sing praise and worship songs in church and sing along to the songs I like.  

There was a day I sang, "a Capella", in front of a large group of people.  I sang part of  Neil Young's "Love is a Rose" at my daughter's wedding.  Sure, I planned and practiced what I would say and sing.  Yet, I sang somewhat naturally from a heart that was spilling over with love for my daughter and her marriage.  She grew to be independent, capable, and developed many friendships.  Now she was committing to live her life out with a very good man.  It was joyful day.  Our friendship continues to grow as we share more of the reality of our true selves and our life stories.

It's an only church in town dream where everybody's praising and worshipping together. Praising God for what He has done and worshipping Him for Who He is.  Yes, everybody singing with all they've got!

Just for today...

"Sing a Song" Julie Andrews and the Muppets (1980)

"Wonderful things can happen today because I welcome the thrill of participating in my own life."  Courage to Change (p. 70)

March 9th - Did I run a good race?

The story...

It's the 22nd mile of the October 17th, 1999, Detroit Marathon.  A man, dressed in black and red, stood outside a bar with a table of clear cups that seemed to contain beer and wine.  He offered all runners the opportunity to quit the struggle and rest - "take it easy."  The guy who I was running with stopped and left me. I'm nut sure if he left at that moment; but, I do remember the deep-felt sense of discouragement when he left me on my own.  We were sharing a common goal, a pact of sorts, that we committed to along our journey.  My family cheered for me before Belle Isle and I expected them at the finish line - I longed to finish.  

The last game played in Tiger Stadium was September 27th, 1999.  The race finished with a lap around the bags and a final step onto home plate.  I heard my family, all Tiger fans, yelling for me as I stepped on the first bag - the emotion was overwhelming and wonderful.  I just barely qualified for the Boston Marathon that day and ran the great race in the spring of 2000.

Wow ... did that really happen?

The race story reminds me of that final scene in the movie Saving Private Ryan.  Ryan says to his wife: "'Tell me I've lived a good life.' and 'Tell me I'm a good man.'"  I believe my finish time at Boston was precise to the second.  What's the measure of a good life?  Everybody's life is clearly different. Scripture says that our Creator has a will that's partially worked out through his creatures.  His creatures certainly are free-willed and seem to all have a difficult time truly loving God, their neighbors, and even themselves.

The only church in town would proclaim and teach the revealed Words of God.  The wonderful and mystical reality of our lives being safe within Christ, and the Spirit of Christ in us - the good life worked out together.

Just for today...

"Today I will remember that uncertainty is not a fault but an opportunity. Everything I do and everything that crosses my path - people, situations, ideas - all have the potential to contribute to my growth and understanding."  Courage to Change (p. 69)

March 8th - A friend to all is a friend to none

 The story...

When in my 20s, I had a reoccurring fantasy of owning a bar that sold food.  I'd stop by a couple of times per day to see the familiar, laugh with old friends, and meet new people too.  Saturday mornings would find me doing the "books" at my favorite seat - "my" booth.  The morning sun would be shinning through the windows and I would feel comfort and self-fulfillment.

A few times a year, I'd drink beer and dine at a place called "Tip a Few" in Grand Haven, MI.  It's similar but different from my imagined place of goodness and comfort. I liked to order a pitcher of "Pabst Blue Ribbon" beer - the beer I often shared with friends during my college years.  Inevitably, I'd resurrect the dream of owning my bar with great enthusiasm.  The one who knows me well would say "here you go again" and they'd sit back with "that smile I hold dear" as I retold my vision of how it would be and how great it would feel.  Five minutes after we left the front door I'd again say: "what was I thinking?"  Then, the one who knows me well would squeeze my hand and we'd walk on together - laughing.   

For the last 3.5 years I haven't drank alcohol and seem to have lost any interest in it. Personally, I had practical and situational reasons for stopping.  I've started other good habits that're now part of who I am.  Personally, the change hasn't affected where I go much yet I returned to that place only once.  The people respectfully served me water and I enjoyed the experience with muchness.  That old-fond dream seems to be vanquished and gone forever - that's good.

It's water

Would the only church in town attempt to simulate this common "good" experience with coffee bars and breakfast nooks?  I've witnessed a few good "tries" yet they seemed to be a bit pretentious and fall short - they weren't the thing.  I expect that people, who'd go to the only church in town, would be looking for the real thing - to better know the Word of "That Than Which there is No Greater" and to be more like the person that He is and wants them to be - their aim. 

 

Just for today...

"A friend to all is a friend to none."   The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle (340 BCE)

March 7th - Imagined reality

The story...

Have you ever imagined something and then built it?  You weren't too sure about how it'd work out in "actuality" yet you got started.  You laid the pieces out on the table.  You arranged, substituted, tried again, until it seemed just right.  While looking at your work you might have felt a deep-internal satisfaction.  The symmetry, the colors, the flaw, the shadows, the order . . . you liked looking at it. What's the cause of this deep-felt satisfaction?  I'm sensing those feelings now.

I made this isosceles triangle yesterday. The story isn't found in what it's for.  It's more about the idea of working an imagined idea into reality, pondering it, and enjoying it.  Actually taking the time to pause, observe, and see in solitude.  Scripture says that God created - He knew who we would be.  He enjoys His creation and creatures.  I wonder if God feels something like I feel, albeit infinitely greater and different, as He observes us?  Is this another way we're made in the image of God?

How does this apply to the only church in town?  Most churches design a building to fit the group's expected needs and hopes.  Those that helped create it have a special affinity for it.  Thirty years from now the people will be different, the building a bit more decayed, and patches will give it a different look.  

The Apostle Paul refers to the "Body of Christ" as a called-out group of people.  Grasping this most wonderful idea requires our imagination as we read about it.  Through faith, you just might sense the beginnings of this wonderful, yet mystical, union of people in reality - introspection and contemplation required. 

Just for today...

"I don't have to look back at past ugliness except to learn from it, to enhance the present, and to release whatever beauty is trapped behind old secrets and self-defeating attitudes." Courage to Change (p. 67)

"I permitted Myself to be sought by those who did not ask for Me; I permitted Myself to be found by those who did not seek Me. I said, ‘Here am I, here am I,’ To a nation which did not call on My name."  Isaiah 65:1 (NASB)

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."  Romans 15:13 (NASB)

March 6th - Like swimming laps

 The story...

They say swimming is good for you.  For me, it's my best alternative.  I wonder what swimming is like for young athletes; all those hours with their head down thinking about what?  This is my second go at swimming as part of a life style - a habit.  The whole process takes about two hours with 35 minutes actually doing my version of freestyle.  I pack my bag, drive, find a space, find my way in, talk to a friend, change, shower, jump in, start my Apple watch, swim, shower, change, talk again, and drive somewhere.  Why would a sane person do such a thing?  For me, it's part of a better life.  I expect that people who come closest to knowing me would agree that this is a good investment of these chunks of life.  I plan on sticking with it until...

How does a person think while their eyes are watching those tile squares, on the bottom of the pool, flow by?  I used to think about how much longer I had to do this - my watch takes care of that now.  Each time's different yet the same in some ways.  You can't hear much, can't see much, can't smell much, can't taste much but you do feel a whole lot as you almost weightlessly float along.  I come out of the pool feeling rested and more peaceful.  And, a bit closer to my inner-man - maybe even my spirit/Spirit connection?

The one I love is running is within this photo.

The only church in town might feel like the community pool.  I hope you enjoy pondering this one and maybe even planning to visit your community pool.  Might a change to your routine help you "be."

Just for today...

"When I was angry and wanted to argue, I silently fumed.  When I was hurt and wanted comfort, I pouted. When I wanted attention, I talked non-stop. I couldn't understand why I rarely got the responses I expected!  I no longer expect anyone to read my mind."  Courage to Change (p. 66)

March 5th - Wring Out the Value

The story...

The scene from long-long ago, I'm sitting at a conference table with a man from Hong Kong.  He's explaining plans for a new high-rise office building to replace their existing building.  I'm attentive - I'd heard stories about the "buzz" that characterized Hong Kong - I wanted to experience it too.  He explained that the building was being replaced to improve area traffic flow.  Large buildings are obviously expensive so this surprised me.  Why would they do such a thing?  They were replacing it for the benefit of the whole community.  Then I ask: "How old is the existing building?"  His answer shocked me: "It's seven or eight years old."   

I was reminded of the Hong Kong story when enjoying ice sculptures that were shown in the heart of my home town. They'd already begun to melt.  They also offered value to me and the community who chose to observe them.  Yet their expected life span was counted in hours.

How long might the only church in town last?  Buildings and their "value added" come and go.  Yet, I hope that the people who congregate there will "wring out" all of the value they can until...

Just of today... 

"I used to believe thinking was the highest function of human beings . . . I now realize loving is our supreme function..."  Hope for Today (p.65)

A wise friend offered me the following good advice: When a thought takes hold of your mind and shows signs of becoming obsessive thinking, stop, allow four minutes to reflect on what's true about it and then decide if something truly needs to be done on your part.  If not, continue on living. 

"Let go of the things you don't need to open up room for your strengths, skills, and feelings to become more fully part of your life."   Courage to Change (p. 65)

March 4th - Otherwise

The story...

A poet, I'm not; however, I do own a book of poetry that's beneath an end table in our living room. The book is titled "Time's River - The Voyage of Life in Art and Poetry."  Kate Farrell selected the art and the poems - they were published by the National Gallery of Art, Washington,in 1999.  The book is organized under four phases of life:  Childhood;  Young Adulthood;  Maturity;  and Old Age.  I saw these life phases in a series of paintings during a tour of the Smithsonian Museum in 1982 - I sometimes contemplate those life paintings and relate to the character depicted in those paintings.  I wonder: "am I solidly in the third or fourth phase?"  Am I experiencing the right stuff?

Please enjoy "Otherwise" written by Jane Kenyon in 1947.

I got out of bed on two strong legs. It might have been otherwise.

I ate cereal, sweet milk, ripe, flawless peach. It might have been otherwise.

I took the dog uphill to the birch wood. It might have been otherwise.

At noon I lay down with my mate. It might have been otherwise.

We ate dinner together at a table with silver candlesticks. It might have been otherwise.

I slept in a bed in a room with paintings on the walls, and planned another day just like this day.

But one day, I know, it will be otherwise.

How does this poem relate to the only church in town?  My life is both my own and part of the communities that I'm a part of.  My communities do shape and form me.  They're likely a key part of what I take with me into the next life.  Hebrews 4:15 confirms that Jesus the Christ's life on earth is important to Him so I expect ours will be important in eternity too.  I intend to continually grow my faith and more naturally love God with all my heart, strength, and mind.  And, I am learning to love me and my neighbor too.  Yet, one day it will be otherwise.  Thank you Jane for sharing a "good" piece of your life with us today.

Just for today...

"This day is a beautiful room that's never been seen before. Let me cherish the seconds, minutes, and hours I spend here. Help me to think before I speak and pray before I act." Courage to Change (p.64)

March 3rd - Lovingkindness

The story...

Listening to Simply Red's song "Holding back the years" seems to emote feelings that abide deep down inside me.   Those welled up emotions remind me that I'm wonderfully human - a "seeker."  A unique creature who's loved by our Creator in Christ.  I'm built to learn and grow in relationship with other characters who're also journeying through this epic story of life.  

We all know that the years can't really be held back.  Yes, the "saying" is true that the only constant in this life is that there'll be change.  Change can help us grow to be more like...

How does this relate to the only church in town?  I expect that the church will work best when people are allowed to be less guarded and more fully okay with who they actually are.  Maybe, they won't feel the need to fit in with the group by putting on one of those acceptable masks that might be ready and stacked up next to the front door.  It'd be a place where you could be the best version of yourself that's both kind and open to kindness - lovingkindness.

Just for today...

"To me, maturity includes:  

• Accepting love from others, even if I'm having a tough time loving myself . . . 
• Having an opinion without insisting that others share it . . . 
• forgiving myself and others . . . 
• caring for people without having to take care of them . . . 
• accepting that I'll never be finished - I'll always be a work-in-progress."  

Courage to Change (p. 63)

March 2nd - The missing piece

The story...

It's fun to build jigsaw puzzles with friends.  Each of us has are own way of doing it; yet, we all contribute towards the same aim - to complete the puzzle.  If you look closely, you'll see that there's one piece missing.

Thank you Teddy Roosevelt for saving our National Parks.

Frequently there's one piece missing.  Where do those lost pieces go?  You may be thinking that they go to the same place where lost socks go.  So, is the puzzle complete?  Did we fail?  Must we throw it away so that this outcome doesn't reoccur?  I'm leaving you with these questions.  You know your answers and the related questions.

How does this relate to the only church in town?  The pieces of the group continuously change.  It seems, there will always be at least one missing piece.  Yet, the group is uniquely wonderful when we're all being ourselves in Christ - focused on our North Star - That Than Which There is No Greater!

Just for today...

"Someone said, 'I wasn't born this way; I learned.' When I heard that, I felt more hope than I had ever experienced."  Hope for Today (p. 62)

March 1st - A knot that binds

The story...

I learned to tie many knots as a Boy Scout - even the life-saving Bowline knot.  You can actually practice tying the bowline with one hand like you might want to if you're hanging from a cliff holding onto the end of your rope.  I practiced this over and over and became rather adept at it for a few days; then, I forgot it.  I likely wouldn't be able to recall that knot method if I find myself precariously hanging from the end of my rope and needing to tie that life-saving non-slip knot - like that's gonna happen.

There's one knot that's imbedded in my memory as a habit that doesn't seem to be erasable.  My dad taught me this knot to tie on my fishing lures.  The emotional pains and feelings related to losing a favorite lure, or possibly the biggest fish of the day, motivated me to learn the method and do it "right."  I tie that knot the same way my dad taught me.  First, you spin seven times - not six or eight.  You can find alternative fishing line knots on YouTube.  They claim to be stronger or simpler to tie.  Am I going to change?  Strangely, no.

There're times when I need to tie a knot, with fishing line, that's not a slip knot.  For example, like when tying an invisible line to prop up an object or to form a safety line to prevent the object from falling from a top shelf.  

Can you see the line?

Who do I call when I'm in need of a specialty knot?  I dial up YouTube and learn from a person who most graciously took the time to share their knowledge with all who want to know.  Thank you YouTubers!

How might the fishing line and knot knowledge relate to the only church in town?   The supporting roles are often hard to see and often require specialized knowledge that may be learned throughout a lifetime. 

Please accept my heartfelt thanks for the supporting role(s) that you provide within your communities.  I expect that we all know and feel it when we're using our talents and gifts in the way that's uniquely ours.  I'm so thankful to be found safely in Christ and that the Spirit of Christ can perform great works even through me.   

Just for today...

"Disappointment, bitterness, and resentment are ties that bind, and until we release these feelings to God, we remain bound to the past."  Hope for Today (p. 61)

"Humility prepares us for the realization of God's will for us; it shows us the benefits we gain from doing away with self-will."  One Day at a Time (p. 61)

"If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are."  Zen proverb

February 29th: Be free in Christ - unshackled from self bondage

The story...

I can't get no satisfaction trying to please me - it's impossible.  Worse yet, on my own, my efforts to be a good boy leave me insecure when facing rejection, inevitable suffering, and death.  I can't get no satisfaction on my own - it's like tugging around a ball and chain made out of self.

Life would be better if I was okay with me, more openly and honestly relating to other people, and bearing the type of fruit that comes from abiding in Christ - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  Scripture says that happens as we trust in Christ and abide in Him too.

Abiding in Christ means a transforming, metamorphosized, relationship that includes communication.  We can never fully understand the trinity of God yet we do know, from the gospel of John, that God the Father speaks messages to the Son of God; the Son speaks the messages to the Holy Spirit; and the Holy Spirit indwells and speaks the messages to those in Christ; and those in Christ pray to the Father in the Son's name.  Prayer and meditation keeps us close to God in a right relationship that can free us from the bondage of self today.

February 29th, we'll see you in another four years if God so wills.  Let's keep the communication flowing - we need each other.

February 28th - A ripe old age

The story...

"Abraham breathed his last and died at a ripe old age, an old man and satisfied with life; and he was gathered to his people." (Genesis 25:8 NASB). What does it mean to die at a ripe old age?

Katherine Kyle wrote a helpful article that listed seven signs that a banana is ripe and healthy to eat: 

1. brown spots
2. soft when squeezed  
3. no green on the stem
4. snaps off stem easily
5. easy to peel with no resistance
6. no sound when peeling
7. doesn't leave film on teeth

So, what are the signs that a person dies at a ripe old age?  I expect they'd be considered ripe if they fully worked out their life as their Creator willed.  Maybe they've used up their gifts and resources toward fulfilling their purpose - bearing fruit along the way?

How would people work out their life within the only church in town?  First they'd have an ongoing relationship with God through prayer and mediation.  Then, I expect that the community would offer, and encourage, the application of each members gifts in accordance with the will of God.  They'd  need to know, teach and affirm the knowable will of God.  Then, I expect we'd see the fruits of God's Spirit being worked out along the way.  Like the spots on the banana we'd sense: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Goodness, Kindness, Faithfulness and Self Control within the people as they worked out their lives together.

What a joy it would be to know that I died at a "ripe old age."  Who would merely opt to die at an old age?

Just for today...

How might I best apply what's available to me within the next hour?  Pondering that thought seems good yet a first step of action seems better.   If you're down - walk alongside an encourager in truth.

February 27th - Rejection

The story...

A few years ago, I performed a personal inventory, an attempt of a searching moral inventory of me, and recorded my findings in a blue book.  The process was good for me mentally and also for those parts of me that are deep down inside - that stuff that's the essence of who I am. 

I periodically open my blue book to both reflect on what I learned and to make a few additions too. The big "aha" moment, from my personal inventory, was that I fear rejection and that fear works its way out in ways that I don't like.  I was surprised the first time that I considered the idea that "I feared rejection" - I was surprised it might be true.  Yet, I answered the inventory questions honestly and it did seem that this fear might be motivating me to behave in ways that I didn't want to.  So, I ordered a related book, Bouncing Back from Rejection, by Leslie Becker.  The book both confirmed this latent truth about me and taught me that I could reduce my sensitivity to rejection by bringing my awareness to it.

It feels good to be more honest with myself and less guarded too.  Strangely, it seems that just sharing this experience with others seems to help them to move towards a better way too - encouragement.  Yes, in the only church in town, we might best walk through life side by side rather than tending towards isolation.

Just for today...

"We can help one another find out the meaning of life . . . But in the last analysis, each is responsible for 'finding himself.'"   No Man Is an Island - Thomas Merton

Blueprint for Progress   ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0910034425

February 26th - Goodness

The story...

I experienced a wonderful day in my church community yesterday.  Why?  It may be that I, and my partner, were prepared for our role, leading children's worship, where we learned about goodness and worked out our faith together. It might've also been the old friends that I met - one needed help and asked for it, one sincerely thanked me, one reminisced about one who left us years ago, and others readily accepted heartfelt thankfulness for their service.  I met four new people, while sharing a meal together, and the balanced conversation seemed to show genuine interest and caring amongst the full group.  

My worship service was with kids instead of grownups.  We laughed, told stories about our lives, participated in the learning, clapped and interjected praise into the worship clapping activity.  We heard a wonderful story that God shared with us - being a good neighbor.  The group included people who were different from most of us - that felt good.  We ended the time doing an art project alongside each other.  We sat side by side, brushing shoulders and elbows, while we turned our blank piece of paper into something that kind of matched what was our imagination.  Finally we broke our assembly and pulled away from our togetherness - I looked back and thought "that's the way I want to live."

My project - my friends liked it and I liked theirs too.

Might the only church in town be more like that?  Hmm...

Just for today...

"If I urge someone to do what I think I would do in a similar crisis, and my advice is acted upon, the outcome may be an even greater tragedy, and I would be responsible for that. . . . . I do not know what course of action is right for anyone else. I can offer only comfort and compassion, and the good example of the life I am trying to build."  One Day at a Time (p. 57)

"Sometimes the forgiveness process fosters deeper unity and connection between people. Sometimes it points to the exit sign."  Hope for Today (p. 57)

"Shame is an excuse to hate ourselves today for something we did or didn't do in the past. . . . Today I will love myself enough to recognize shame as an error in judgement."  Courage to Change (p. 57)

February 25th - That albums left on the turntable

The story...

I left home, to go to college, with goals of: independence, knowledge, career, friends and true love.  I was fortunate to meet a friend who became my roommate for two semesters.   Stereo systems and music were important then.  Strangely, we left only one of two albums on our turntable during those days.  His favorite song and my favorite song.  I actually bought a second copy of Rust Never Sleeps because I wore the first one out.

Maybe the songs were favorites because they triggered dormant emotions or contained messaging that rang true.  I can feel some of those same emotions as I listen to My My, Hey Hey as I am typing this sentence. "It's better to burn out than to fade away or rust" resonated with my soul.  It feels good to be in touch with my soul in an honest way.

How does experiencing the reality of our emotions and soul work out in the only church in town?  Scripture says that the power of God is alive in a believer when walking humbly with God.  God given love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control reflect a great condition to be living in during all circumstances.  I expect that the church functions as well as God functions in each individual member.

Just for today...

✌

Hey, hey, my, my
Rock and roll can never die
There's more to the picture
Than meets the eye
Hey, hey, my, my

Out of the blue and into the black
You pay for this, but they give you that
And once you're gone, you can't come back
When you're out of the blue and into the black

The king is gone but he's not forgotten (Johnny Rotten, Johnny Rotten)
Is this the story of Johnny Rotten? (Johnny Rotten, Rotten Johnny)
It's better to burn out 'cause rust never sleeps
The king is gone but he's not forgotten

Hey, hey, my, my
Rock and roll can never die
There's more to the picture
Than meets the eye