The story...
There are reasons for why I did the things that I did. Reasons for the good and reasons for the not so good. Sometimes I ignored information and put on rose-colored glasses to gloss over the truths that would prevent me from working out my will.
I learned to be more honest with me and my situation; understanding more fully, albeit incompletely, the way God views my condition and life. With this in mind, why do I continue to have resentments, for what other people did, crop up into my mind? I know that the self-absorbed thoughts aren't good for me, or anybody else; yet, they seem to reside somewhere, dormant, in the back of my mind. Do I keep them to reduce the risk of a reoccurrence?
People within the only church in town will need healthy boundaries to work out their faith and life amongst the wide range of people who're likely working out their phase of life the best they can. Maybe life is actually better without attempting to bend reality. Honest humility seems likely to gain trust in God and maybe a few close friends too. Truly, rest and peace can be found walking humbly trusting God.
Just for today...
"I am no longer a victim, full of self-pity and bent on control of every aspect of my life." Courage to Change (p. 205)
"Resentments mark the place where I see myself as a victim . . . Feeling resentments was like drinking poison and hoping that the other person would die! . . . What do I get out of feeling like a victim? . . . I felt protected by my resentments. They acted as a barbed-wire fence to keep away the people I felt had hurt me. The problem was I kept pricking my own skin on the barbs. I also was comfortable with my resentments." Hope for Today (p. 205)
"Hurtin each other; Loses all around - Eyes off me; Feelin more sound." Am I a Poet?