September 10th - "Fake it to make it" or "accept another's belief until it's real for you?"

The story...

We invited a new couple from our church to our home for dinner.  After dinner, we were sitting out on the deck discussing essentials of the Christian faith and contrasting that knowledge with the actual reality of a faith worked out - a real and working relationship with God and other people too.  Uncomfortably, we opened up the subject of "faking it to make it."  Clearly they were not attending this "new" church to be with people who were faking their Christian faith; yet, we acknowledged that trying on the Christian faith might be part of a process by which selves do work out a sort of death in preparation for beginning life as a new sort of creature in Christ.  They did move on to another church not long after our dinner discussion - that's okay.

Faking a belief that you hope is true, so that it might become real, seems wrong.  Wanting to believe what another person believes and therefore believing that they believe as a first step also seems wrong.  Yet, both of these paths might lead to that illusive outcome that's promised to be the very best.

Will the only church in town instruct children to act in a manner that's in accordance with the will of God before they're saved - yes.  Will non-believers be accepted just as they are and be allowed to act out the role outwardly before they are changed internally - yes.  Ideally it'd be different but it often ain't.

Just for today...

"Gradually and together we built roots and a pair of wings so I could soar and feel connected at the same time. I borrowed her faith until I acquired my own."  Hope for Today (p. 254)

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster."  Friedrich Nietzsche

September 5th - Enjoying my imaginary Olympic games - did I spend too much time there?

The story...

I loved the idea of the Olympic Games and often imagined competing in my favorite event(s) - decathlon, downhill skiing, biathlon...  I'd be the victorious one who worked hard to overcome all problems and shortcomings to be the best.  "It would be soo... great to win."

It pained me to think that the wait was four years between events.  I do wonder whether the reality of the games was as good as I hoped it would be.  Certainly, I never actually went to the games and the TV coverage was much more limited then.  Was I living in that imaginary world trying to fulfill needs of mine?   I sure enjoyed following: Mark Spitz, Bruce Jenner, Edwin Moses, Eric Heiden, Usain Bolt, Bode Miller, Katie Ledecky...

Pride in my Country and hopes that I too might win in the game of life seemed like positive traits.  Did they compel me to want to be a better man?  Even if I couldn't actually win, I could live more often in an imaginary world where I might.  Was I spending too much of my thought life in an imagined future versus living out the actual day(s) that were mine?

I expect that the only church in town would preach the Good News of how we can live out this life, and the one to follow, walking humbly and close with God.  Imagining the future and reflecting on the past are helpful yet they surely are less important than living out the reality of today.  Today is where we both can live out each breath of this miracle of life and be in the present where God is.

Just for today...

"I'd get so caught up in what I was going to do that I often wasn't aware of what I was doing now . . . I give thanks for the little joys in each day. I still make plans, but I don't let my thoughts erase the present. Anticipation is sweet, but not at the cost of today."  Hope for Today (p. 249)

"The true nature of my problems was my stubborn refusal to acknowledge feelings, to accept them, and to let them go. I have very little power over what feelings arise, but what I choose to do about them is my responsibility. Today I can accept my feelings, share about them with others, recognize they are feelings, not facts, and let them go."  Courage to Change (p. 249)

"Our greatest handicap is self-deception. We cannot recognize in ourselves the faults we criticize in others."  One Day at a Time (p. 249)

August 6th - What does a really good day look like in your daydreams?

The story...

There was a summer, during my middle-school years, when I didn't do much.  I delivered my daily newspapers, participated in family stuff, watched too much TV and daydreamed. Strangely, I remember contemplating my rather dull summer while thinking it really didn't make any difference - the summer was nearly over too for those who actually lived out the type of summer I hoped for.  Yes, that chunk of life was over for everyone.

Daydream - Lovin' Spoonful

What would I tell the teenage me If I could sit down with him back then?  Would I tell him about the good circumstances that awaited?  Would I tell the rather short me that I'd grow to be 6' 4" tall?  Would I tell him that it was better than he thought?  Would I share an appreciation fir the good that he actually had available?  Or would I tell him to focus on the greatest two commandments in the bible:  Love the Lord your God with all your heart, strength, and mind.  And, love your neighbor as yourself?  I expect what I really needed was to understand, be understood, and to learn to love and be loved just as I was.

Would you rather be loved in poor circumstances or unloved in favorable circumstances?  In my humble opinion, my best days are those where I'm loving my neighbors as myself.  A day when I'm a best friend to me which seems to serve as a source of strength for loving other people.  And, I can only love me if I'm right with, or at peace with, God the Father.

People attending the only church in town will hear about how they too might be right with God the Father through His provision.  The bible says faith in His Son's redeeming death, burial and resurrection positions people in Christ - a place where we can be rightly related to God and enjoy a most wonderful condition both now and forevermore. (Ephesians 1)

Just for today...

"I would put aside critical thoughts of others. I would notice interesting things - the expressions on people's faces, a plant growing on my windowsill, the grace and charm of a child, an arrangement of clouds. Today there are wonders all around me, if I will open my eyes and enjoy them."  One Day at a Time (p. 219)

August 4th - Express yourself - really

The story...

Yesterday, I listened to a guest speaker describe his perceived value of knowing the difference between his imagined self and his real self.  Yes, we all likely developed and refined an image of who we were to "better" cope with the realities of life. 

Our need to belong to, or fit in with, any group often leads to a sort of group think - a place where pleasing people and conforming to group norms is very important.  Bruce Lee describes his value of expressing himself within the following video.

Isn't it best to belong to and fit into the group that you identify with?  Isn't it polite and respectful to think and behave like the group?  You did have some control over the decision to join the group and possibly even become a "member."  

Visitors to the only church in town will likely find a different world view - a place where they might express a more true self.  It seems they'd start with themselves, then with others, and ideally with God too.  Or, it could be another place where they'd merely conform to the new group norms - if they feel group acceptance then they're okay?  Maybe they aren't okay if they merely fit in.

For me, it seems that we'd all want to be our true selves walking in a actual relationship with our Creator and God - being okay each day and expectantly living with eternity in view.  Yet, that means that our imagined self would need to be transformed in a sort of death.  Our imagined self, or ego, seems to want an environment that conforms with, and bolsters, this image that's been developed and refined throughout a lifetime.

Just for today...

"'But he knew what I expected,' not realizing that it may have been precisely for this reason that he rebelled and acted otherwise."  One Day at a Time (p. 217)

"Since my parents were my main authorities in my life until then, I expected my boss to treat me the same way my parents did.  I acted on the expectation by shutting down in fear.  If I felt uncomfortable about something in the workplace, I kept quiet. When I felt my employee rights were violated, I stuffed my anger."  Hope for Today (p. 217)

July 28th - Living in the present - it takes time to live there.

The story...

"What are you thinking about right now?"  I remember asking that question to multiple people who answered with their response: "nothing."  Since I seemed to be constantly thinking about things, I interpreted their feedback as not being very self-aware, hiding their thoughts, self-medicated, or merely being a non-contemplative personality.  To my knowledge, it never crossed my mind that they might be living in, and experiencing, the "present" as opposed to living in the "past" or "future."

How did I wake up to the value of living in the present?  A significant personal issue led me along a path of brokenness and obsession over probable causes for the turmoil and those who contributed to the problem.  I was obsessing over the situation and it was affecting me negatively - physically, mentally, spiritually, and relationally.  I met with a group of people who had experienced similar life brokenness and they taught me the value of living in the present where life, the Spirit of God, and real relationships are worked out in reality.

I practiced, living in the present, while hiking in the woods.  When obsessive thinking about the past or future began to weigh heavy upon my shoulders, I literally brushed them off with my hand.  I focused on my five senses and experiencing what was going on in my environment, my heart and my spirit too.  The process of "living in the present" took about two years to integrate into the actualities and patterns of my life - what a wonderful change for the whole me.

I've been told that living too much in the past leads to depression and that living too much in the future leads to prolonged anxiety - that rang true to me.  Living in the present, where actual life and God are, clearly seems to be the best way to experience reality, relationships, love, and the seemingly illusive good and satisfying life.  You just might find all joy and hope there too (Romans 15:13).

The people visiting the only church in town may witness love and the value of living within God's presence.  He did all the heavy lifting to forgive all the sin that separated us from living "the good life" in the "present" walking humbly with God (Micah 6:8) - true peace and rest.

Just for today...

"A stonecutter may strike a rock ninety-nine times with no apparent effect, not even a crack on the surface.  Yet with the hundredth blow, the rock splits in two. It was not the final blow that did the trick, but all that had gone before . . . The results may have revealed themselves abruptly, but I know that all those months of faith and hard work made the change possible."  Courage to Change (p. 210)

July 20th - Why live in an imaginary reality?

The story...

Males in my mother's and father's families were all balding except for one.  My receding hairline and "spot" were visible in my wedding pictures.  I knew it was happening yet it crept up slowly.  Then, there was the day that my friend who cut my hair, Penny, reached for the electric cutter rather than the scissors.  She admitted that trimmers would do just as good as scissors yet she appreciated both my business and our friendship.  The day that I finally accepted that I was bald and began cutting my own hair was a good one.  I let loose of the old and accepted the reality of the new.  Actually, there're advantages living in the reality of being a bald guy.  I could list a few, that you might not be aware of, but that's not what this story's about.

Living within the reality of our actual environment, mental, physical, and spiritual state is the best place to be - peace, well being, and joy can be found there.  Living in an imaginary place, within any of these dimensions, is like living in a house of cards.  Maybe hyped-up emotions are an indicator or sign that you might be living outside reality.  Might those over reactions and need to do exciting stuff, with amped-up emotions, indicate a life lived in the uncomfortable state of an imagined reality?   Are our emotions like gauges that might give us clues as to "What's going on?"

"What's going on?"  4 Non-Blondes

The only church in town would be a place where you can find out what's going on.  People who reach out in love may ask you.  And, most importantly, you can hear and better understand what God has revealed about what's really going on.

Just for today...

"By clutching at what we most want to keep, we lose it all the more rapidly . . . By letting go of our efforts to influence the future, we become freer to experience the present, to feel all of our feelings while they are happening, and to more full enjoy those precious moments of joy with which we are blessed."  Courage to Change (p. 202)

June 29th - Is Isolation a Sort of Cloaking Device?

The story...

I remember day dreaming about a scenario where everybody else was frozen in time . . . paused . . . and I was free to roam and do as I pleased.  At first, it seemed exciting breaking all of the rules and having free reign to go anywhere that I wanted to; but, I imagined transportation, food, and safety issues.  Then, I'd have to admit that it would be horribly lonely and purposeless living in isolation without relationships.  No, it wouldn't be better, more comfortable, enjoyable or even exciting for long.

How do we best respond when we're emotionally hurt by other people?  Do people really respond like Steve Martin in the movie "The Jerk?" Imagining we are self sufficient, don't need anyone else, pretending everything's okay, and moving further down the spiral towards self isolation.

What do we get when we self isolate?  Obsessive thoughts that justify the isolation along with their physical, mental and emotional consequences?   Erosion of the social skills that enable us to get along with and cooperate with other selfish people for our mutual good and growth?  It's kind of like Maverick's self isolation in Top Gun: "Maverick Engage!"

Cabbie's Imagined place of peace and bliss - Movie - Collateral

I hope that the only church in town will allow people the freedom to live out their lives themselves.  Yes, even through periods of isolation; but, I hope that they wouldn't stay away from others for too long.  I hope that a good neighbor, who's also loved by God, would take the first steps toward creating a bridge for them to reenter community. ✌

Just for today...

"Each unconsciously suppresses facts that might reflect badly on him or her, and exaggerates the other's faults."  One Day at at Time (p. 181)

"I no longer merely have to survive the hour, the day, or even the year in loneliness and isolation.  Instead I can learn to trust someone else and take chances..."  Hope for Today (p. 181)

June 14th - Will what works for you really work best for others?

The story...

Oh the countless hours spent coaching others regarding how they might best improve their lives based on my own learnings and experiences.  Sharing my ways of living seemed like a noble endeavor.  This "story teller" style of interaction attracted listeners.  The dream of telling stories as a professor seemed like a good person-job fit so I worked that long winding path towards a PhD.  The last ten years of my career were spent living out my dream job.

I imagined being a professor who lived on a quiet-tree-lined street, in a one-story house, with a big front porch.  Students would stop by to discuss their research work, to talk about life, or to imagine what might be together.  We'd work consulting engagements together where we'd make a real difference.  As you might expect, it didn't work out the way I imagined.  Students and fellow professors tired me by the end of the day and I looked forward to retiring to my condo outside of campus.

Towards the end of the semester, during my first year teaching in Duluth, MN, a student made a comment to me within a large lecture hall.  "I don't see why we're tested on opinions that you have about anything - shouldn't we be tested on what's proved to be true about the subject?"  He was right; thereafter, I clearly distinguished my opinion from the body of knowledge that we studied together.

So, I do know a lot of stuff yet know that a man should be taught as though they've not been taught. Who can know the will of God for another person?  Within the past three years, I've more frequently kept my opinions to myself and found that I now have few opinions as to what another person might best do or be.  It seems, I don't naturally gravitate to forming opinions about other people anymore.  I do look for, and greatly appreciate, closer relationships with other people and my closer walk with God through the Spirit of Christ.

Interpersonal skills worthy of emulating...

Within the only church in town, people would be allowed to actually grow in their love for God, for themselves, and for other people too.  Each person loving in their own unique way and at their own pace.   The measure of their faith wouldn't be primarily based on their knowledge of scripture or church resume - they would be a unique work of God, rightly related to Him, and humbly walking together.

Just for today...

"It's only natural to want to share what works for me with those I love.  But, when I must share it now, I may be more interested in changing others than in sharing my experience, strength, and hope."  Courage to Change (p. 166)

"We ought not to insist on everyone following in our footsteps, nor to take upon ourselves to give instructions in spirituality when, perhaps, we do not even know what it is."  Teresa of Avila

May 23rd - I still haven't found what I'm looking for - I'm still running...

The story...

U2's song, "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" resonates with me and many others too.  I've traveled far, grown much, enjoy a life of prayer, seen fruit born even through me, but I still haven't found what I'm looking for.  My inner-man desires something better.  A place that fits better, more fulfilling, "righter..."  I've seen glimpses within creation and through love demonstrated among people.  Yet, it's just not quite right...

Sistine Chapel - Not home yet

The only church in town would communicate, learn, share and work out what God has revealed about Him, us, and our future too.  No, I ain't home yet.

Just for today...

"I must go past all the tempting self-justification, the 'reasons' that lack the shine of truth.  I tell myself that self-deception can only damage me in giving me a foggy, unreal picture of the person I really am."  One Day a Time (p. 146)

May 10th: Peace in the present

 The story...

It seems that people would want to be at peace with themselves and with others - some tried in the anti-war peace movement in the 1960s.  Yet, people disappoint or hurt us, resources are limited, suffering occurs, our decisions have consequences, we hear of daily acts of violence, God's will is different from ours...

I decided to make a concerted effort to promote peace within my family by giving every member a "Peace Frog" t-shirt for Christmas a few years ago.  The picture below is on the back of one of my two shirts that I really don't wear.  I don't think that my family members wear theirs either.  Actually, I just put this shirt on underneath my V-neck sweater.  It feels more right inside my sweater than flashing it towards those who might see me.  

I don't think that we're peaceful people by nature.  Our efforts to work towards an imagined ideal are good yet I think that reality is a far better place to live.  Scripture says that our reality is that God provides the way for us to have peace with Him, our Creator.  When we creatures are at peace with our Holy Creator, He indwells us in the person of the Holy Spirit.  Through Him, we can bear peace like an apple tree bears apples.

I 'm often surprised when I witness peace worked out within a group of people in the light of day.  And, I expect that people would witness and enjoy the peace of God worked out through the people of the only church in town.  I want to hang out in a place like that - "Right On!"

Shalom

Just for today...

"My unexpected situation turned into a pleasure-filled gift, once I was willing to look at it differently." Hope for Today (p. 131)

"He that is in perfect peace suspects no one, but he that is discontented and disturbed is tossed about with various suspicions..."  Thomas à Kempis

May 4th - Mansion on the Hill

The story...

Are you okay with your character within the epic story of life?  I expect it's good to want to improve our condition yet it's probably more important to appreciate the good in what we got.

I remember imagining how great it would be to be a professor.  Graduate students working real projects alongside me and even stopping by my house to talk about their ideas and lives too.  I'd live in a one-story-brick house with a big front porch.  It'd never be winter on that tree-lined street where everybody felt welcomed.  We'd share our lives as we worked through the reality of this world and what might be.  I'd attend lectures, plays, and concerts.  Life would be bigger, wiser, and more fulfilling. 

The idea was compelling enough that I worked long and hard to earn my PhD and find that university job.  It was good, yet it wasn't as I imagined it would be.  I was tired at the end of a work day and looked forward to returning to my condo - away from campus, fellow professors, and the students too. 

Most people aren't alive and their time under the sun is over.  Biology, astronomy and the science leave me in awe of this "miracle" of life.  Wow, you and I are both alive if you're reading this sentence.  That's a big wow!

We can waste our life dreaming of a better reality, the "mansion on the hill," and miss the wonderful reality of what truly is.  Bruce Springsteen's album "Nebraska" does a good job of delving into the hopes, dreams, and the struggles of being human - the lyrics, guitar, harmonica and his comfortable voice resonated with my soul during a couple phases of my life.

We can look at life good or we can look at life bad.  Suffering breaks some people yet leads others to trust in God and His Word for their past, present and future.  I hope that the only church in town will be a place of joy and hope in the midst of suffering.  Their countenances and talk would speak of overflowing thankfulness for journeying though a life in Christ.   I hope we wouldn't find people commiserating in their futility - hoping for a mansion on a hill for fulfillment.

Just for today...

"If a man happens to find himself, he has a mansion which he can inhabit with dignity all the days of his life."  James Michener

"When a man of good-will is troubled or tempted or afflicted with evil thoughts, then he can better understand how great a need he has of faith in God."  Thomas à Kempis

March 8th - A friend to all is a friend to none

 The story...

When in my 20s, I had a reoccurring fantasy of owning a bar that sold food.  I'd stop by a couple of times per day to see the familiar, laugh with old friends, and meet new people too.  Saturday mornings would find me doing the "books" at my favorite seat - "my" booth.  The morning sun would be shinning through the windows and I would feel comfort and self-fulfillment.

A few times a year, I'd drink beer and dine at a place called "Tip a Few" in Grand Haven, MI.  It's similar but different from my imagined place of goodness and comfort. I liked to order a pitcher of "Pabst Blue Ribbon" beer - the beer I often shared with friends during my college years.  Inevitably, I'd resurrect the dream of owning my bar with great enthusiasm.  The one who knows me well would say "here you go again" and they'd sit back with "that smile I hold dear" as I retold my vision of how it would be and how great it would feel.  Five minutes after we left the front door I'd again say: "what was I thinking?"  Then, the one who knows me well would squeeze my hand and we'd walk on together - laughing.   

For the last 3.5 years I haven't drank alcohol and seem to have lost any interest in it. Personally, I had practical and situational reasons for stopping.  I've started other good habits that're now part of who I am.  Personally, the change hasn't affected where I go much yet I returned to that place only once.  The people respectfully served me water and I enjoyed the experience with muchness.  That old-fond dream seems to be vanquished and gone forever - that's good.

It's water

Would the only church in town attempt to simulate this common "good" experience with coffee bars and breakfast nooks?  I've witnessed a few good "tries" yet they seemed to be a bit pretentious and fall short - they weren't the thing.  I expect that people, who'd go to the only church in town, would be looking for the real thing - to better know the Word of "That Than Which there is No Greater" and to be more like the person that He is and wants them to be - their aim. 

 

Just for today...

"A friend to all is a friend to none."   The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle (340 BCE)

March 7th - Imagined reality

The story...

Have you ever imagined something and then built it?  You weren't too sure about how it'd work out in "actuality" yet you got started.  You laid the pieces out on the table.  You arranged, substituted, tried again, until it seemed just right.  While looking at your work you might have felt a deep-internal satisfaction.  The symmetry, the colors, the flaw, the shadows, the order . . . you liked looking at it. What's the cause of this deep-felt satisfaction?  I'm sensing those feelings now.

I made this isosceles triangle yesterday. The story isn't found in what it's for.  It's more about the idea of working an imagined idea into reality, pondering it, and enjoying it.  Actually taking the time to pause, observe, and see in solitude.  Scripture says that God created - He knew who we would be.  He enjoys His creation and creatures.  I wonder if God feels something like I feel, albeit infinitely greater and different, as He observes us?  Is this another way we're made in the image of God?

How does this apply to the only church in town?  Most churches design a building to fit the group's expected needs and hopes.  Those that helped create it have a special affinity for it.  Thirty years from now the people will be different, the building a bit more decayed, and patches will give it a different look.  

The Apostle Paul refers to the "Body of Christ" as a called-out group of people.  Grasping this most wonderful idea requires our imagination as we read about it.  Through faith, you just might sense the beginnings of this wonderful, yet mystical, union of people in reality - introspection and contemplation required. 

Just for today...

"I don't have to look back at past ugliness except to learn from it, to enhance the present, and to release whatever beauty is trapped behind old secrets and self-defeating attitudes." Courage to Change (p. 67)

"I permitted Myself to be sought by those who did not ask for Me; I permitted Myself to be found by those who did not seek Me. I said, ‘Here am I, here am I,’ To a nation which did not call on My name."  Isaiah 65:1 (NASB)

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."  Romans 15:13 (NASB)

February 19th - But he doesn't know the territory

The story...

PBS television shows, shot in olde England as the backdrop, are compelling for me.  The language, vernacular, customs, figures of speech, and even the side of the car with the steering wheel are different yet similar to what I'm used to. I think I'd feel comfortable there but attentive and curious about the differences.  It'd be great to to tour London and even slog through those really-old hiking trails west of London for a week or so.  I'm told those old trails pass through castles, Roman ruins, and farmer's fields too.  I'm learning about the territory yet I don't even claim to know the territory.  Even if I complete a trip, I won't know the territory as well as someone who actually lives their life out there.  The idea reminds me of a song from the 1962 film "The Music Man" that was set in River City, Iowa - "but he doesn't know the territory."  

The Music Man - 1962

Professor Harold Hill is the lead character who sells the small town on the idea of the "think" system for playing musical instruments. He's a flim-flam man that bilks the town out of money for new band instruments and uniforms - he had no ability to teach them to play them.  He teaches them to hum the "Minuet in G" as part of a thinking process that will supposedly lead them to play their shiny instruments without instruction.  In reality, he's stalling until he receives the money and jumps on the train out of town.  The librarian is the only person in town who actually understands music.  She's torn between the reality of the flim-flam man and the wonderful imagined reality that the town's bought into - they're happier and more hopeful following the charlatan.  She also falls in love with both the vision and the man too - to err is human.

How will the only church in town escape the trap of trusting in the charismatic pastor rather than our God which the text they'll own is all about?  To be merely satisfied with knowing about while remaining deceived within a mutually accepted and self-centered condition.  The Word of God speaks of the reality, in Christ, that bears genuine God-given fruit.  Once heard, believed, and experienced; they'll be tapped into the vine that produces the kind of fruit that the whole community will be blessed through.  Why would a man trust man rather than his Creator?

Just for today...

"None of us sees the world as it is but as we are, as our frame of reference, or maps, define the territory."  Stephen Covey

"The only way to release ourselves from the hold of those dark demons is to break the isolation and bring them into the light by sharing with others who understand."  Hope for Today (p. 50)

February 9th - Live for Today

 The story...

The speaker offered me a new way of looking at a good life: LIVE for today; PLAN for tomorrow; and THINK on eternity.  This frame-of-mind seemed to be true, with "face value," and the kind of motto that a wise guy might apply. So, I pondered the motto, shared the value of thinking this way with hundreds of people, yet didn't really internalize it.  Why?  Maybe I didn't spend most of my time living in the present and my thoughts tended to camp out more in the past or future?

How would this motto work out best in the only church in town? What would we witness if we peeked into the church windows or tailed those church people around town?   It's likely that their behavior would exhibit strengths, weaknesses, character flaws and occasionally fruit that they seem to be gifted with. They would be doers who uniquely work out what they know to be true about themselves and God in the present.  Together they would be better equipped to move forward down a good and right path within God's will.  Success, despite their flaws, would bring glory to their God whom they serve.

In my past, I liked sharing the idea of this good way to live while letting my "self" reign over my life.  In my present, I increasingly make doable plans for the near future and trust God with the results.  If we ignore what we do know about "That Than Which There is No Greater" then it seems we also have an unstated plan for traveling down a well worn path that leads us to where we don't want to go. 

Just for today...

"The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak."  This quote and the following painting are from an abstract impressionist painter Hans Hofmann.   Thank you Hans.

February 6th - From Imagination to Sketch

 The story...

What might the only church in town look like?  I asked a sketching hobbyist friend to paint a one-church town.   She responded with questions regarding what I wanted it to look like.   I told her that I didn't want to bias her imagination but did ask that the sketch reflect the purpose of this blog.  She agreed to draw her image yet seemed a bit uneasy regarding how "good" it would turn out to be - would it meet my expectations?  She did good...

I wonder if we would more readily "draw" from our inner-person, soul, or heart if we periodically did spiritual reality assessments.  It seems like we would grow in our self-awareness as we pray, meditate on truths, and invest in quiet time where we humbly turn our ear and heart toward God.  Is this part of what it means to walk humbly with God?

Just for today...

"Troubles are opportunities to grow, to make us better, not bitter.  Rightly used, we can learn from them not to repeat our own mistakes."  One Day at a Time (p. 37)

"When in doubt, don't."  Courage to Change (p. 37)

February 5th - Idealized Hopes

 The story ...

The lyrics, of the MercyMe's song "I Can Only Imagine," kindle wonderful images in both my imagination and inner man.   What will the reality of the next life be like?  Scripture reveals Words from God and images that people were given, or experienced, such as in Isaiah 6.   I expect that all of our images are wrong; yet, close enough to motivate us to move toward them and experience real grow along the way.  

I imagined how my future spouse would fulfill me by meeting my love needs.  It probably didn't occur to me that she would also be hoping that I would fulfill her love needs and that she wouldn't be capable of fulfilling mine. These idealized hopes likely kept us moving forward until we rested in reality versus the ongoing strain of striving for an unattainable "best."  I've heard it said that insecure singe people, who marry to fill the void they feel, will likely idolize their spouse.  If and when their spouse doesn't fulfill their fantasy, then the idolizing may turn into demonizing.

I can only imagine the only church in town, that might be characterized as "the best," yet I doubt that it can every truly exist.  Personally, I've spent too many destructive hours critiquing the church, and the people in it, for not meeting my expectations.  Might the attainable good church be the place where people learn to do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with God in Christ (Micah 6:8).

Might the "good" only church in town best be communicated as a painting?  I admire those who can paint what they see or imagine in their mind.  I'm not an artist yet I did invest a chunk of my life toward imaging and painting something that was hidden in my inner man. I understand that it's best to just display a painting and let the viewer decide what it means to them.  So, here it goes - my first public display of my artwork.  Please be kind.

Thoughts for the day ...

"Think," yet resist those thoughts that are impulsive, compulsive or reactive.  Aretha Franklin has something good to say about thinking.

December 24th - Acknowledging reality

 The story...

My desk is a mess.  True, I don't currently have a designated place to put everything and I've more stuff than I need.  Yet, I know that I can organize my desk - I've done it in the past and I've the resources needed to make it happen.  Being organized is better and I've got the time to make it happen.  In fact, I expect that I'll actually enjoy the process once I get started.  So, why don't I get started?  I understand that this introspective quality is uniquely human - and a good focus of conversation with a close friend.  It's so freeing to be grounded closer to reality than our imaginary "world" that we "wish" was true.  Yet, might our best introspective efforts be an illusion?

The only church in town will review the reality that's expressed in the Apostle Paul's book of Ephesians and Philippians - wonderful truths, revelations from God, that you won't discover from self reflection.  Why?  They're revealed by God for the benefit and hope of his creatures - us.

Just for today...

"Focusing on ourselves simply means that when we acknowledge the situation as it actually is, we look at our options instead of looking at the options available to other people. We consider what is within our power to change instead of expecting others to do the changing."  Courage to Change (p. 359)

November 26th - Relationships - Good "Vibes" - Like tennis?

The story...

My close relationships are very important to me.  They require an investment of my whole self for focused periods of time.  Here's the glue that makes 'em stick for me:

• Who: similar personalities and journeys - ages from 35 yrs younger to 5 yrs. older.
• What: equal sharing, & listening, of life's reality & ideas for what is and might be.
• Where: at a coffee shop, restaurant, church, or via computer.
• When: every other week - convenient time of day - one to two+ hours.
• Why:  honestly sharing life-walks - giving & receiving - growing together.
• How: sharing equally without unrequested opinion - like a good game of tennis.

How is a good relationship like a good game of tennis?  You share equally by taking turns serving and returning the ball.  You treat each other with respect or you won't continue to play.  Must plan to meet periodically at a court and time that's okay for both.  You've similar goals for the tennis experiences.  You'll accommodate your partner as physical limitations happen.  The joy of returning their shot on the sweet-spot of your racquet, at the same level of energy, is invigorating - it's like you're fully connected yet being fully independent.  Conversation with a good friend is a lot like that.  Please don't even think about turning the joy of a relationship into a win-lose game like tennis might be.

The sweet-spot of the racquet is where the vibrations of the racquet cancel out and the forces are more fully transferred into the ball return.  Those vibrations are irritating, fatiguing and even harmful to our bodies.  Yes, a good conversation and a good tennis volley are similar.  We all know how fatiguing the unwanted "vibes" between people can be - they aren't okay within a close relationship - they continually wear down, erode, and destroy relationships.

The only church in town will be one group with a kind of personality of their own.  There'll be sub-groups that'll have their own personalities too.   Within these "purposed" groups you'll find opportunities to develop friendships with a person(s) similar to you.  These relationships will be like walking side-by-side through life focused on reality - the most important spiritual reality that truly lasts.  When we stray from the path, a friend can help us  "wake up" and return to the life-giving path.

We're blinded to this spiritual reality when we focus on ourselves and ignore who we actually are as creatures - creatures created by a living and active God.  He's interested and powerfully working through our todays, tomorrows, and our eternal future too - He says so.  Experiencing a relationship with Him in Christ is like no other.  

Just for today...

"... we don't tell anybody what to do. People only accept and use advice they're ready for . . . When I am asked for advice, I know only what I would do if I were faced with the same problem, and not what would be right for another."  One Day at a Time (p. 331)

"I learned to trust no one, to stay silent at all costs, to stuff my feelings, never to stand up for myself, to take on more responsibility than I could handle, to love conditionally, and to tell white lies to cover up my home life. No wonder as an adult I perceived that close interpersonal relationships were like constantly moving targets.  Usually I was the one who was moving because I lacked the skills to develop and maintain healthy adult relationships."  Hope for Today (p. 331)

November 25th - Might my imagined reality be bent? Unrealistic? Blinding me from truth?

The story...

I thought it wise to imagine and create a positive self image of: who I was, how I wanted to be perceived, how I planned to change, and how I'd execute the plan.  I'd hold onto this imagined reality and defend it even if it took much persuasion and the bending of reality too.  I wanted to be perceived as a good actor in the story of life and reap the rewards.  Sadly, my imagined reality and story didn't mesh well with other people's imagined plans and stories.  So, I worked to influence, manipulate, or even control them so that they supported my story - like supporting actors in the story of "me."  It's hard to write this, let alone read it aloud, yet it seems true to my nature.

Surely, the world is harsh, alongside other selfish people, so it seems reasonable that we adopt a self-created role that allows us to get along while still trying to get our needs met.  When our efforts to get along don't work, we may pick up our toys and go home - stay isolated - seeking warmth within the small comfort found by wrapping up in that old raggedy blanket of our self image - sounds a bit cold and Grinchy.

The only church in town will share God's revealed Word about the nature that we were born with - the selfish, self-sustaining, and self-promoting nature that looks toward meeting our own needs first.  They will hear about what God did to pay for our redemption, pay our God-offensive debts, so that we might walk through this life and eternity with our most holy God and Father.  Wow, that's good news they will hear there - the story to know and share.

Just for today...

"Sometimes the greatest growth comes through pain, but it's not the pain that helps me grow, it's my response to it.  Will I suffer through the experiences and continue as before or let the pain inspire change that helps me grow?"  Courage to Change (p. 330)