July 1st - Let 'em Be Free

The story...

My rebellious spirit resisted efforts to fix, manage, or control me.  Had I been more compliant, I likely would've received better grades, learned to play a cornet better, better understood what others were into, and been a part of more groups too.  I do greatly appreciate the groups and relationships that I've been a part of; yet, I seemed driven towards freedom from group think and domineering controlling types.  Sadly, this meant that I had to find ways to deal with the rejection that goes along with a rebellious spirit.

The jobs that I chose, and flourished in, allowed me to exercise my independence and drive change in the processes that mostly converted inputs into outputs.  Rebel against the status quo and change things to make them better.  The jobs involved imagination, risk, reward, influence, and an internal need to succeed - I was naturally good at this type of work and change characterized my career.  When things became too predictable, I moved on towards the next thing.

Was I born to walk this road or was I a product of my environment?  Nobody knows the answer.  I do believe that we all need every person to work out their unique abilities, skills and talents for the benefit of us all.

How might the only church in town be a place where all people would congregate when some of them are rebels like me?  I think that we'd let each person work out their own life and provide opportunities for groups who would focus on relationships amongst congregates.  Yet, the - North Star - purpose would always be for each person to rest in their right relationship with God in Christ.  A body of Christ with Christ as the head.

Just for today...

"...what I view as a finely developed sense of responsibility may actually amount to a form of dominance." Hope for Today (p.183)

"...the man I married cannot be the source of my happiness or sorrow.  The gift of life is personally mine - as his life belongs to him - to enjoy or destroy, as each of us wishes."  One Day at a Time ([. 183)

"Ever'thing there is but lovin' leaves a rust on yo' soul."  Langston Hughes

June 29th - Is Isolation a Sort of Cloaking Device?

The story...

I remember day dreaming about a scenario where everybody else was frozen in time . . . paused . . . and I was free to roam and do as I pleased.  At first, it seemed exciting breaking all of the rules and having free reign to go anywhere that I wanted to; but, I imagined transportation, food, and safety issues.  Then, I'd have to admit that it would be horribly lonely and purposeless living in isolation without relationships.  No, it wouldn't be better, more comfortable, enjoyable or even exciting for long.

How do we best respond when we're emotionally hurt by other people?  Do people really respond like Steve Martin in the movie "The Jerk?" Imagining we are self sufficient, don't need anyone else, pretending everything's okay, and moving further down the spiral towards self isolation.

What do we get when we self isolate?  Obsessive thoughts that justify the isolation along with their physical, mental and emotional consequences?   Erosion of the social skills that enabled us to get along with and cooperate with other selfish people?  A kind of withdrawal like Maverick's in Top Gun: "Maverick Engage!"

Cabbie's Imagined place of peace and bliss - Movie - Collateral

I hope that the only church in town will allow people the freedom to live out their lives themselves alongside others.  I hope that they wouldn't stay away from others for too long.  I hope that a good neighbor, who's also loved by God, would take the first steps toward creating a bridge for them to reenter community. ✌

Just for today...

"Each unconsciously suppresses facts that might reflect badly on him or her, and exaggerates the other's faults."  One Day at at Time (p. 181)

"I no longer merely have to survive the hour, the day, or even the year in loneliness and isolation.  Instead I can learn to trust someone else and take chances..."  Hope for Today (p. 181)

"They're not safe; Yet they're fun - Let's abide; Don't gotta run."
"Accept their love; As it's given - Fill your tank; Start a liven."
"Love overflows; Natural and true - He's the source; Comin thru you."   Am I a Poet?

June 28th - Relationships are found in the present

The story...

Freddy Fender's song "Wasted days and wasted nights" describes a man who's blue due to the choices of the girl which are beyond his control and influence.  He seems camped in his memories where he hoped that things would've been different - if only... then he'd be "all set."  He seems stuck in the past and wasting his present reality.

We may wish we could take back the wasted days and wasted nights trying to relive our past.  Strangely, our imagined perspective of the past is likely far different from the actual perspectives of those who shared it with us.  To compound the problem further, those who shared your past were likely focused on themselves and perceived a small part of what was going on.  They likely recall little about those days that were not so important to them.  Are they truly important to your current reality?

For my momma's last birthday presents, I loaded up an electronic photo frame with pictures from my mother's past.  It actually creeped me out as I left it displaying on our dining room table prior to giving it to her.  She seemed to have a similar reaction to it too.  Reality, in the present, is the best place to be - that's where your relationships are.  And, the present is where you meet with God too.

The only church in town will work out their faith in the present.  Truly they'll learn about God and his creatures from our record of the past.  They'll also enjoy the presence of God; their savior the Lord Jesus the Christ; and other members of the body of Christ there too. 

Just for today...

"I spent most of my life having expectations of, and making unrealistic demands on, everyone around me . . . the person I was hardest on was myself . . . Members encouraged me to eliminate 'have-tos' and 'shoulds' and to slow down so that I could consciously choose which changes felt right to me."  Hope for Today (p. 180)

"My life is too important to be wasted waiting for someone else's choices, even when it's someone I dearly love."  Courage to Change (p. 180)

"How happy and useful I could be if I weren't carrying around such a load of unpleasant emotional turmoil.  No one asks me to, so why do I?"  One Day at a Time (p. 180)

"If she only; He won't say - Try in vain; Blocks my way."
"Try lovin me; No can do - God loves first; Makes love true."
"Redeemed by Christ; Be in peace - Life's anew; So's the lease."    Am I a Poet?

June 25th - Why do I resist prayer?

The story...

I was trained to be an industrial engineer (IE).  One of my IE tasks was to plan for the capacity to produce products.  I learned people learn new processes and systems at predictable rates.  Their speed of learning may be modeled by a constant percentage every time they double the total number of parts they've produced to date.  The multiplier will be at about 80% for simple assembly work and up to 95% for more complex work.  For an 80% manual-job learning curve, this rule-of-thumb would project that a 10 min. time for the 50th part would be reduced to 8 min. for the 100th part.  The idea is right even if my facts are a tad off.

So, what's the learning curve look like for my prayer life?  My capacity to pray and time I spent praying doesn't fit the learning curve model.   First, I don't remember being taught to pray.  My family often recited a version of the prayer Jesus taught His disciples before meals - I remember it as follows:

"Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory forever, AMEN."  Luke 11:1-13  

I've listened to other people pray aloud - their prayers were addressed to themselves, the prayer group, God, Jesus, and sometimes to no one in particular.  My prayer history had ebbs and flows, desert and rainy seasons, anxiety and peace, new truth and despair, full acceptance and lost, long and short, revelation and no sense of change, quiet and loud, on my knees or speeding, one-way and two-way, natural and foreign, loving and left outside, trusting and questioning...

I wish I'd prayed more.  I'm going to pray right down and tell you what happened when I'm done.  Here it goes...

I prayed for 8 min. 5 sec. My heart was right, I praised and thanked God.  I made my requests known for others. I was quiet for about a third of the time and felt emotions and physical feeling within my body too.  It felt good and right - a place where I want to be.  Yet, as I'm typing I've returned to my life journey.  My prayer respite is but a memory.  I wonder how that prayer might've affected lives and God's intervention.  We may never know the answer to questions like these.  Yet, God has revealed that prayer's critical towards our relationship and receipt of His lovingkindness. 

Yes, the only church in town would be a place of prayer.  People would work out increasingly reliant relationships with our God and seek Him and His will in prayer.  If we were prayerful sorts, might we enjoy each other more?  He's faithful.

Just for today...

"Am I too busy too pray? Have I no time for meditation? Then let me ask myself whether I have been able to solve my problems without help."  One Day at a Time (p. 177)

"Eyes on me; I insist - Quiet with Him; I resist."
"Wanna but don't; Why's it so? - Peacefully praying; Best we know."   Am I a Poet?

June 21st - Bike Tours Bathe in Kindness

The story...

What does kindness mean to me?  I remember when older, wiser, and more powerful adults invested their time with me and took an interest in what I thought, did and hoped for - they were kind.  I remember people allowing me to share my thoughts when they had more knowledge or knew where I was wrong - I likely wasn't aware of their kindness.  I remember people witnessing my sadness and coming along side me until I felt better - kindness felt.  I remember riding my bicycle across Iowa in July; people fed me, watered me, entertained me, and provided a safe, more comfortable, place - the whole bike journey and Iowa seemed kind.

RAGBRAI - Kindness

So, am I a kind person?  I'd like to think I am.  Yet, I've limits to the degree that I'm willing to engage in other people's lives and share my limited resources.  Why?  I don't want to characterize myself as self-centered though I know that I'm selfish by nature - I've a track record that confirms it.  I was busy doing the work thing, raising my family, and amassing the stuff I thought I needed to achieve my life expectations - the "too busy" thing is no longer an excuse for not being kind.

I'd like to be characterized as a kind person.  So, what's my game plan?  I expect kindness is something different than love.  Maybe it's love worked out amongst others.  As a supervisor, it was unkind to not hold subordinates accountable for improving and achieving good results.  As a parent, it was unkind to try to fulfill your children's desires and thereby stunt their growth.  So, kindness probably isn't perpetually doting on or "helping" others.  I expect that kindness is intertwined, with love, justice, and respect too.  Sometimes, kindness may mean separating from one you love, saying goodbye, so that they can venture out on a new path that they must say hello to without you.  I know that God is kind yet true to all of His other qualities too.  People who've been pruned or disciplined by God may not feel kindness until they came closer to God, with a right heart - the peace of God.

The only church in town will have people who are living the good life in Christ, trusting God's promises, and more rightly related to God in actualities.  People would live out their life circumstances together and experience love along the way.  Like selfish caterpillars morphing into a kinder and more loving butterfly - the power of God transforms people like me.

Just for today...

"If I concentrate on being tolerant and kind at all times, with everyone, it will soon become and automatic reaction, no matter how trying the circumstances might be.  This attitude will color whatever I do and make me more acceptable, to myself as well as to others."  One Day at a Time (p. 173)

"Ya seem okay; Met my need - I'm better; Watered my seed."
"I'm growing; To separate someday - Blooming forever; Christ's way."   Am I a Poet?

June 20th - The Stacking Habit

The story...

My story begins with an attempt to share a bad habit that I replaced with a good one.  I selected a habit that to change over the next month.  Was I able to replace the habit with a better one?  Would I be more comfortable with me?

The habit I choose was: organizing the stuff near my side of the bed every day.  I've a habit of stacking things and quickly tossing items to the nearest stack.  The stacking seemed to invite my spouse, without actually saying so, to stack stuff there too.  I willed to organize my side of my bedroom every day after I completed the nytimes.com "Wordle" game.

My Wordle result - 05/17/23

It's been said that a good way to begin a new habit is to "Stack" it after a habit that you find pleasure in and look forward to.  Personally, I look forward to every Sunday morning when I meet my friends at church, synch our lives, remind each other of the reality of what God's revealed, and to praise and wordship "That in Which There is No Greater."  Being involved in the only church in town will involve people and their sin which will inevitably cause conflict and problems when focused on the Holy.  God's Word and Power will offer peace for each of his "Christ Ones" as they navigate through life together.  People and their habits being transformed toward...

IS THE STACKING PHENOMENA OVER?  No, I still have a stack of stuff next to my bed although I do periodically organize.  Maybe the stacking is part of my routine/habits that best fits this stage of my life?  I'm okay with the stacking me today - living in the present more honestly and humbly.

Just for today...

"The 'defects of character' I want to be rid of are sure to have deep roots in habit . . . If I am truly willing, I will see them replaced gradually by impulses of a different quality, that I can live with, comfortably and free from self-reproach."   One Day at a Time (p. 172)

"The first step in learning to respond more effectively to others is to learn to respond more effectively to myself.  I can learn to respond with love, caring, and respect for myself, even for those parts of me that experience fear, confusion, and anger."  Courage to Change (p. 172)

"Ain't no plan; Results aren't good - Try again; Don't like should."
"Someone loves me; We're a team - Do as one; Smiles gleam."    Am I a Poet?

June 19th - "I Get it! - Why is it so hard for you?"

The story...

I remember my older sister teaching me how a letter in a math equation represented a quantity that could vary or have only one possible correct answer.  Initially, I rejected the idea that a math equation could contain letters - "come on, you can get it, it's easy."  I eventually did get it.  In fact, I got it before the rest of the kids in my class were even introduced to the idea.  Yes, I was something - the pride of life. 

My brain was now "wired" to better understand what a variable was and that there were relationships between many things.  I took math all the way through differential equations and applied linear statistical models - it wasn't easy but I made it through many new ways of thinking that helped me to model and solve problems within complex systems.  I better learned some of the equations that govern how our reality works - the way He designed it.  I learned to design experiments, work problems through groups with Six-Sigma, and eventually took on responsibility for a chunk of the body of knowledge as a professor.  "Cite your sources."  "What's the basis of your claim?"   "Record your assumptions." "I don't care about your opinions - give me the facts."  "Popular Mechanics is not a peer-reviewed journal - you can't cite anything from that periodical."  Eventually, most got it too.

I've moved on from my professor role. I haven't taught a class, mentored a fledgling researcher, or served as a journal article peer-reviewer for over five years.  Some question how I could work so hard along a life path and then go in a new direction.  My new path, or life purpose, is to become a better man and community member who walks closer and more humbly with God in Christ.  It seems my eyes are focused more on others and my heart leans closer towards eternity - that's a good place to be.

The only church in town will represent the community who are encouraged to live out the phase of life that they're actually in.  People in the later phases will show respect and dignity to people who are walking through a phase they've previously lived through.

Just for today...

"Blaming my discomfort on outside events can be a way to avoid facing the real cause - my own attitudes.  I can see what is happening in my life and take responsibility for my response."  Courage to Change (p. 171)

"As I understand the difficult task of facing myself and my faults.  I will guard against self-justification and self-righteousness."  One Day at at Time (p. 171)

"I'm all set; Life's a bore - Engage again; Tired and sore."
"Made to work; Yes I am - Seeing more; Trusting Him."   Am I a Poet?

June 18th - Expectations - A Blame Game

The story...

Thankfully my spouse and I chose to stay members of the same church for 40 years.  Along that journey, most attenders decided to move to another church that better met their needs.  In my limited experience, they were most often disappointed with pastor(s).

Their complaints often go along the following lines of reasoning:  Shouldn't the preacher have worked out their faith regarding the doctrine they espoused.  Shouldn't I see gaps between the quality of their life and the life of the pastor.  The pastor should've worked out a more honest an ongoing spiritual life based on a calling to serve and a superior knowledge of God's revelations.  Do they have a deep and honest relationship with God?  Weren't they ordained and vetted by the people who know God and His Word?  Is their relationship with God reflected in their loving relationships with others too.  Shouldn't the pastor's life be characterized by the peace of God worked out within most of life's circumstances?  "Shouldn't I be able to witness God's promises fulfilled in a life worked out through faith in His revealed Word?"  If he can't actually work out this honest good life then why am I listening to him?  "Is he a 'jar of clay?'"

Some people stay and choose to accept their pastor as they are and dote on them - treat them as a sort of pet who needs a lot of attention and kindness to be okay and happy.  Give them a lot of positive feedback, getaway vacations, and gifts.  They likely brag about the qualities of their pastor while they treat him as a sort of "better" extension of themselves.  Emphasize and highlight "everything" that happens in their lives and give them plenty of attention too.  

Yes, it's easier to blame or dote on the pastor rather than to be honest with our own reality.  Scripture says that we're born with this "sin" problem that separates us from our Holy Creator.  Our efforts to learn and apply the secrets of the "good" life are in vain due to our inherent sin nature.  We must obey the greatest commandment to love the Lord our God with all our heart, mind and soul and our neighbor as ourselves; yet, it's not within our nature to truly do so.  God says that His Son, Jesus the Christ, died to atone for this sin debt that separates each of us from a right relationship with our Holy God - our Father.  Even more strangely, scripture says that only God knows whose heart, inner person, is right with God and whose isn't.  And stranger yet, He indwells those who are truly His via the Holy Spirit or the Spirit of Christ.  He is our evidence of our salvation and the "seal' that confirms that we're right with God.  That's good news that people would treasure within the only church in town.

Holy Spirit - In stone

Just for today...

"Will I blame others for what I do on the ground that I am compelled to react to their wrongdoing?" One Day at a Time (p. 170)

"I was in the habit of blaming two particular people for all my problems.  I would take turns detesting and obsessing about each of them instead of focusing on myself."  Hope for Today (p. 170)

"I'm not okay; You seem better - We struggle; Can't get along."
"Got good intentions; You did wrong - You seem happy; Whilst I'm sad."    Am I a Poet?

June 17th - Remember the joy of floating down that river?

The story...

There's a dam and a river between Hamlin Lake and Lake Michigan.  The dam regulates the current flow - inner-tubbers can slowly float to lake Michigan on most summer days.  It flows faster as it narrows and slows as it widens.  As it breaks through the sandy beach, it speeds up in the narrows and  cuts deeper.  Eventually, it flows into Lake Michigan.

The memories of floating and swimming with friends invokes feelings of happiness and a sense of peacefulness.  It took a lot of work to get all of the floats, fins, life jackets, towels, goggles, books, lotion, and beach chairs to their correct position at either the start or end of the float trip.  One person had to drop the van off and run back to the start.

That lazy river might be a metaphor for life.  God has a will for our lives that flows with relative ease and purpose.  Yet we can kick hard to try to go back upstream, worry about a little bit of rain when we're already wet, venture into the shallows to check out a shiny object, or even kick to the shallows and slow way down while watching others float along.  I remember jumping out to tow a couple tubes and stepping on a fishing hook - ugh.  Yes, floating is about resting and trusting in the river's power.

The only church in town would teach about God's revealed power and provision.  Life, like the river, requires us to do our part and trust God for the rest.  Might we work out our part of the problem and detach?  Let God do the heavy lifting and directing as only He can do.

Just for today...

"... if I could subordinate my will to His.  This is a stumbling block for so many of us: we feel obliged to apply the force of our will to our problems.  No solutions can be found in this way."  One Day at a Time (p. 169)

"Floating free; Oer powered water - Being along; To Thy end."   Am I a Poet?

June 9th - What does it mean to be good?

The story...

"Rommel, you're such a good boy."  I must've heard words like that, directed toward me, but I don't recall them.  If I did, I'm not sure what those words would've meant.  They likely would've meant that I was respectful, obedient, trustworthy, helpful ...  Wait a second! That sounds like the Boy Scout law:

 "A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent."

How does that compare with what God says is good?

"He has told you, mortal one, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8 (NASB)

The difference may be that the first one is a law, that boys are asked to strive toward, and the second requires walking humbly with God in a loving manner.  How do I work out my life humbly - walking rightly with God and loving my neighbors?  God is holy and I'm not.  I was born selfish with a heart that's like an idol factory.  Those idols were barriers between me and my relationship with God.

Message to me on a felt board as a 7 yr. old - I believed it.

As I grow older, through the seasons of life, I'm walking closer with God.  Our relationship seems to bear His fruit - scripture says fruit's born through the Spirit of Christ who indwells me as a Christ one.  Yes, I've put my faith in the Son of God and His great redemptive work.  My old nature tempts me to idolize my own fantasy, where I may waste my: precious time, relationships, financial power, and even emotions.  I'm positioned complete in Christ and without Him I'm wandering through life towards...

People within the only church in town would witness people walking humbly with God with loving hearts.  They'd witness some Christ ones resting in peace through life's trials and sufferings as they journey toward separation from their body.  They'll likely see the gap between their own reality and what God said they can be.  God, the vine dresser, growing people in Christ (John 15:1-5).

Just for today...

"'The last thing I need is to be more humble.' Hadn't I been humble all my life, putting everyone's needs ahead of my own? . . . I had confused humility with humiliation . . . humility, I discovered, is the ability to see my true relationship to God and to my fellow human beings."  Courage to Change (p. 161)

"What wonderful things could happen in my life if I could get rid of my natural impulse to justify my actions! . . . Being honest isn't easy . . . I know that self-deception multiplies my problems."  One Day at a Time (p. 161)

"'I was afraid to say what was on my mind or in my heart for fear of being ridiculed, shunned, or criticized . . .  Now I have a reputation for being direct, honest, and open . . . I can let others know how I think and feel . . . I have a right to share what is in my mind and heart."  Hope for Today (p. 161) 

"You're a good boy; Momma said - I did bad; Was she wrong?"
"She wanted better; Both her and me - Imagined truth; Just ain't real."
"God sees me good; Thru His son - Peacefully believing; Son in son."   Am I a Poet?

June 7th - Let it be heard - lament

The story...

I've had the joy of meeting weekly with a group of men while we studied the bible.  One Monday night we were considering the lamentations of the prophet Jeremiah who lived 40 years warning Jerusalem of God's pending judgment.   The people, temple, palace, city, law, festivals, and land would be punished for not being the called out group of people that God required.  A remnant of 4,600 people would be exiled to Babylon for 70 years to cleanse the people and the land from the effects of sin.  Jerimiah lamented deeply - he's known as the weeping prophet.

All life involves suffering.  Ignoring, pretending and hiding seem to be reasonable ways to cope; yet, they run rife with bad consequences.  Bottled up emotions and pretending are no way to live a good life either.  God's Word say He knows our heart and hears our prayers that cry out with the pain inflicted from both our personal and collective sin. 

The only church in town would be acutely aware that they're living in a cursed world.  People need to be restored when sin inflicts it's damage.  Real freedom and love are offered to us by God through faith in His great work in Christ.  Yet, the pain and sufferings of life take their toll.  God hears our lamenting and loves those who walk faithfully beside Him within the only church in town.

The Passion Of The Christ - Tear Drop From God

Why not go to a quiet place and let it out today?

Just for today...

"Courtesy . . . is an expression of love, warm concern for the other person's comfort, peace of mind and well being . . . The practice of courtesy in the home gives us many opportunities each day to convey our love in little ways."  One Day at a Time (p. 1'59)

"When I turn off one feeling, I shut off all the others . . .  Sobbing, wailing, lamenting - all different ways of discharging my pain so that I can heal - allow me to experience the strength of my aliveness."  Hope for Today (p. 159)

"Mood chemicals flow; Might feel blue - Must I react; Are they true?"
"Wonderful sensors; Super-hero tall - Fully human; Feelings and all."   Am I a Poet?

June 4th - But I was beginning to win under the old rules...

The story...

"The times are changing.  It's God's judgement that the Bible prophesied. Can't you see what's happening?  You might lose everything you worked so hard for.  Are you just going to stand around and do nothing?"  I've heard different variations of this story throughout my life.  People afraid of a future where other people will connive to change the rules of the the game of life towards their favor.  The status quo wants to keep the "rule set" that governed their life - just when it looked like they might win in the game of life, "bad" people want to change the rules.

The Game of Life

I know God is the creator and I'm the creature.  I know in part and God knows all. 

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord."  Isaiah 55:8-9 (NASB).

“The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us..." Deuteronomy 29:29 (NASB).

Is it reasonable that living within the will of our Creator and Sustainer is best?  Is His will knowable?  If so, what should I do today?  What will I do today?

Today I plan to:

• faithfully fulfill my commitments
• enjoy the meal that's set before me
• read part of God's Word to better know "what's going on?"
• love the Lord my God with all my heart, soul, and strength
• be kind to me and love my neighbor as myself
• see more of life - choose wide angle versus telephoto lens
• be thankful

The only church in town will have people who fear more than trust in God and His Word.  The Spirit of Christ, bearing fruit through His people, will compel self-absorbed folks to turn from their struggle and trust God's revealed truth as to who they are.  Yet, their selfish old nature will likely compel them to reject reality and the different set of principles that go along with it.  The old master of their life is tough and they've adapted to him - this new life seems real good yet doesn't seem doable or sustainable - yes, it would take the power of God to live a life like that.

Just for today...

"If I were to pray: "My will be done," wouldn't it be exactly what I am saying when I ask God to do what I want?"  One Day at a Time (p. 156)

"I used to think I always had to do something and that waiting was a waste of time.  Now I know God speaks to me while I'm waiting."  Hope for Today (p. 156)

"Oft traveled path; Hold on tight - Naggin inkling; Where'm I goin?"    Am I a Poet?

June 3rd - Self-help books - Does your self need help?

The story...

Family members were reading an Og Mandino book; "You have to read it.  It teaches you how to live your life right.  It's an amazing story."  As a young man, I read the book - it was an amazing story.  The story was written with claims that suggested it was true; yet, I later realized that the story might not be true.  There was no internet then to check Wikipedia's version of the truth.  Yes, it was a fictional story.  Now, the lessons learned were meaningless - rules of thumb, principles, or ideas that might increase your odds of things going your way.  I chucked the book.

"If I could just dance like that then everything would be..."

The only church in town would preach and teach the way to have an ongoing and eternal relationship with God.  People being different without "trying" to be better.  People would be as they're gifted rather than futilely attempting to comply with all those "ought haves" and "should ofs."

Just for today...

"Defending ourselves by engaging in arguments with . . . irrational people is as fruitless as donning armor to protect ourselves from a nuclear explosion . . . I am not obligated to justify myself to anyone."  Courage to Change (p. 155)

"God, please lead me to those who can give me what I need and grant me the compassion to love those who can't."  Hope for Today (p. 155)

"A program of self-recognition and self-change 'reads easy and does hard.'"  One Day at a Time (p. 155)

"Don this mask; They kinda say - Act like this; Be our way."
"You ain't good;  We're okay - Want their love; Try and obey."
"Faith in Christ; When you see - Loved and Loving, This you'll be."
"Rooms in heaven; Peace right here - Walk with Him; Hearts do cheer."   Am I a Poet?

June 2nd - Feelings of Unfairness "Morphed" into Thankfulness?

The story...

I'm sitting at my table trying to think of an example of when I was treated unfairly.  I can think of many without one good example.  Maybe it's because thankfulness has pushed out the space where I stored resentments?  I hope so.

I'm so thankful today.  Pain and suffering are sure to come yet my hopes for the future are positive.  I look forward to continual growth and am thankful for life.  Yes, I'm thankful for that last full breath of air as it entered my lungs as cool air and left as a warm exhale.

The bread of life...

The people within the only church in town would be thankful and generally okay - The grace of God witnessed in action through people with skin on them.  They'd be more capable of loving God, themselves, and other people too.  Unfairness would meet up with grace - grace would win.

Just for today...

"No amount of self-discipline can heal us from resentment.  Sometimes it seems the more we struggle against it, the more it sneaks up on us, surging like a dark sickness into the mind, plunging our emotions into turmoil."  One Day at a Time (p. 154)

"Ignore me; Push away - Away from 'em; Nothing to say."   Am I a Poet?

May 23rd - I still haven't found what I'm looking for - I'm still running...

The story...

U2's song, "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" resonates with "seekers."  I've traveled far, grown much, enjoy a life of prayer, seen fruit born even through me, but I still haven't found what I'm looking for.  My inner-man desires something better.  A place that fits better, more fulfilling, "righter..."  I've witnessed veiled glimpses of spiritual/eternal reality; yet, I want more.

Sistine Chapel - Not home yet

The only church in town would communicate, learn, share and work out what God has revealed about Him, us, and our future too.  No, I ain't home yet.

Just for today...

"I must go past all the tempting self-justification, the 'reasons' that lack the shine of truth.  I tell myself that self-deception can only damage me in giving me a foggy, unreal picture of the person I really am."  One Day a Time (p. 146)

"Seeking truth; Livin real - Loved & Lovin; The real deal."   Am I a Poet?

May 19th - Fear and Hope - Opposites

The story...

I'm sitting in a pew listening to the call to fear and worry.  "Expect to be persecuted . . . this is no longer the nation where we grew up."  "Batten down the hatches - a storm's brewing!"  This seems to be the opposite of hope in God, the Creator, and His revealed plans for His creatures.

I'm not prone to fear; yet, I've been afraid.  I don't know what it's like to face the world with expectations of doom and gloom.  Sure, I've enjoyed reasonably good health and insurance too.  More of my investments have been profitable than unprofitable.  I've never gone hungry, or been homeless, unless I placed myself in a situation where that was part of the plan.  I'm thankful that, but for the grace of God, I'm not the worrying, less hopeful, sort.

I'm truly thankful with great hope for the future.  I appreciate the eternal life perspective that I was taught and worked into my reality by faith - faith in the Holy One who redeems His creatures so that they're found in Him through Christ.  I think that my inner-man, heart, is secure yet storms and trials will come...  This post seems like a long string of "I" statements.  I'd rather be in a place where "I" focused more on others and the communities that we actually live in.

Manhood - by Thomas Cole

The only church in town would be a group that's sustained by hope within the promises and upheld Hand of God.  Yes, Alan Jackson would be welcome to sing of the power in the blood of the Christ in the only church in town.

Just for today...

"The future - even as close as tomorrow - is a closed book.  We cannot know what it holds, and the more we look for disaster, the more we invite it . . . This is something only God knows..." One Day at a Time (p. 140)

"Wasn't I comparing my insides to other people's outsides . . . If I compare, I lose.  Maybe I'll come out feeling better than somebody this time, but next time I'm bound to feel worse."  Courage to Change (p. 140)

"They've got that; I'm this way - We don't fit; This they say."
"We're all moving; A path we're sold - Ready or not; Truth be told!"    Am I a Poet?

May 18th - Are you trying to fix, manage, and control another?

The story...

So, I was uncomfortable with the pain that another was going through.  It seemed like I was "helping" them by working out a plan for their life, giving them that subtle suggestion, that tearful hug, that offer to help, that vision of who I think they might be if they would just...   If it were me, or when I was in a situation like that, I would...  The offer was to live vicariously through me and not try to work it out on their own - "you just aren't capable of 'winning' in the game of life on your own - you need me."

It's a good thing to see a person grow from dependence, to independence, and then on to interdependence - a fully functioning independent member of community.  There are many people that think it's just too risky to let others live their lives without their co-management, influence, and control - "you need me!"  Who might they have been if they were respected and shown the dignity necessary for them to work out their own life alongside others? 

Do these girls have a chance?  Backyard 4/02/23

Nobody wants to see people struggle within the only church in town.  Many think they're called to interfere and counsel others toward their version of the life style that they too are trying to live as they oughta.  Might they be advising them away from the narrower good path and on towards the wider and well worn "safer" path?

They're God's kids - he desires a fully-functioning relationship with them.  Why not rest and let them be?

Just for today...

"Today I suspect that adversity has value I hadn't previously recognized.  When I face adversity and deal with my problems or express my feeling, things have a chance to improve . . . finally begun living life on life's terms."  Courage to Change (p. 139)

"He was a mechanical puppet, powered by his wife's determined will . . . it was the only way the poor man could escape from the terrible domestic powerhouse."  One Day at a Time (p. 139)

"I need to respect their right to choose, free of my interference, judgment, and control."  Hope for Today (p. 139)

"Loosen your grip; Swing straight through - Let'em live; They'll thank you."   Am I a Poet?

May 16th - Did I Take Up Too Much Space?

The story...

I grew up within a loud-large family where I felt the need to interject my story quickly, with enthusiasm, and in an interesting way, for people to acknowledge me - to fit it.  I was born with a personality that I seem to have crafted into that role - mine was different than the others.  When I left the confines of my family, I realized the need to adapt my role playing to better "fit in."  I assumed the "real" me wasn't enough to naturally fit in - to avoid rejection.  So, I became proficient as the story teller.  I gravitated toward people and places where stories were told - where I could shine.  The college bar scene was the perfect environment until it wasn't.

My spouse married a fun guy - the story teller.  He was loud, funny, enthusiastic, and the idea guy - she complimented me in ways where I was lacking.  We were a good team - friends.  We had kids, supervisor jobs, and community roles that required adaptation to fit it.  

Later in life, I became more comfortable with me and dropped some of the habits that made up parts of my persona.  Some of my current "ways" might have been more natural for me, as a young boy, if I grew up in a different type of family.  Yet, I'm thankful that I tended to engage in life, liven the group with story, embark on new adventures, and change things up. 

Today, I'm truly a better listener - respect and value others more too.  I'm thankful for my current character within this epic story of life yet I also value my past roles - the tapestry of who I am.

The only church in town would appreciate each person as they are within their story.  Collectively, they'd know that they're a key part of a much richer tapestry.  A place where all people can rest, learn, grow, and abide in the reality of who they are in Christ.

 

Just for today...

"A wonderful nurturing atmosphere is created when people help other people by being themselves and sharing their own experiences."  Courage to Change (p. 137)

"When I feel I must take a radical and irrevocable step, shouldn't I make sure I am not motivated by resentment, hatred, or anger?"  One Day at a Time (p. 137)

"Love her so; She don't know - He acts in; It be so."
"I'm okay; Adapt I will - Bit more guarded; Rejected still."    Am I a Poet?

May 15th - Don't Expect Much - You Might be Surprised.

The story...

My wife and I were sitting at a freshman-orientation session at a college that was founded on Christian principles.  I only think I can't count on accurate memories of the past - I remembered the speaker as, Joe Stowell, a character in life who I admire - the actual speaker was Rex M. Rogers.  He shared that one out of ten of their professors were going through a personal crisis.  So, within each school year, there'd likely be at least one professor who wouldn't meet our expectations.  "Resist measuring the quality of the institution and it's messages based on your assessment of the people who work here."  

When I meet people, I likely: sense them, hear them, watch them, listen to them, interact with them, map their characteristics, and compare them to me and others I know.  Then I form a set of expectations for how they're likely to behave.  In my later years of life, I've thankfully minimized a last step of judging them as to whether they are "gooder" or "badder" than I thank they oughta be.

Curious George was my favorite character

When people behave in unexpected ways my interest and emotions are aroused.  I become curious.  I enjoy learning about people as they are as opposed to how "good they might be" if they were closer to my expectations as to who they oughta be.

I've heard that the course of each person's life was due to their genes, environment, randomness, and a series of reasonable choices.  If it weren't for the "grace of God" I may have wallowed in a bad place. 

I know that it's best to have a realistic set of expectations for people's behavior.  Some might say "hope for the best and accept the rest."  To me, it seems better to "don't expect too much and appreciate what you get."  Reality is a good place to live.

I hope that the only church in town would accept and gracefully love people just as they are.  If not for the grace of God...

Just for today...

 "Nobody but God knows what goes on inside another human being . . . I am not blameless . . . there is much to be changed in me."  One Day at a Time (p. 136)

"I needed to accept that they were operating at the highest level that they could at any given time . . . I accept their right not to change."  Hope for Today (p. 136)

"Don't expect much; They may surprise - Unexpected growth; Becoming wise."   Am I a Poet?

May 11th - Be kind to you - take it slow

The story...

I greatly appreciate every opportunity to meet with a friend where we leave our guns and armor at the front door.  No agenda, just hanging out together, sharing what's going on within life's journey and our inner man too.  It seems that it takes years to develop that type of vulnerable and trusting relationship.  I've a few relationships like that and I greatly value each of them.

Sometimes a friend's struggling with their current condition, suffering, coping, dealing with those people, or disappointed with themselves.  They seem to breathe a deep "cleansing breath" when they hear a message like: "Hey, come on, be a best friend to you, treat yourself nice; give yourself some grace man.  You know how long it takes for us to grow - be patient with you already."

God's second greatest commandment, "love your neighbor as yourself," validates the legitimacy of loving yourself as part of our foundation for living a good life.  Might I love myself as I am, not just when I'm performing up to my imagined standard of who I oughta be?  YES!  Let's give ourselves a break already.  Show you some grace like the grace that God offers.

Meaningful and lasting change takes time. In my experience, it takes about three times as long as I'd expect to make fundamental life changes.  What kind of changes am I talking about?  Developing close friendships, fully engaging within the group, living in the present, avoiding obsessive thinking, truly seeking to understand before being understood, loving those I've little affinity towards, eliminating self-defeating behaviors, avoiding even the idea of changing another person, working out the greatest commandments in actuality...

My turtle friend, from long ago, took it slow - a patient sort.

The only church in town would be characterized as kind.  Kindness and love worked out amongst real relationships within the indwelling presence of God. Whoa, who wouldn't want to be part of a group like that?

Just for today...

"I spend more time with myself than with anyone else . . . Today I will spend some time exploring the most intimate relationship I will ever have - my relationship with myself."   Courage to Change (p. 132)

"I will learn to relax my stubborn grip on sufferings and allow the solutions to unfold by themselves." One Day at a Time (p. 132)

"You do what?; Begin to see - Maybe I could; Love me be."   Am I a Poet?