The story...
My significant other is going away for eight days. Why do I have this need to plan activities to keep me busy? Does this need suggest that my life isn't peaceful now? Or, have I structured my life around a pattern of habits that'll be disrupted without my girl? Do I need a series of planned activities to validate my sense of self worth? I do want to be okay rather than behaving in ways that allows me to imagine that I'm okay.
What does an okay, peaceful, day look like for me? Maybe it's hard to live out the better reality without a purposeful plan or pattern. Its a little uncomfortable to actually write it out. Isn't that the goal of a blog? Okay, the following is my generic plan for living out a peaceful and fruit bearing day - limited to 15:
- Wake naturally from restful sleep
- Do a few things that I look forward to
- Pray, meditate and listen
- Reflect and clarify within my blog
- Interim fast while drinking plenty of water
- Reach out to at least one friend
- Exercise in nature and community
- Be kind to those I meet - risk loving and being loved
- Invest one hour managing household and finance
- Enjoy my lunch
- Do or learn something new
- Keep opinions to myself and challenge their validity
- Serve somehow, somewhere - engage in community
- Seek to understand before being understood
- Read God's revealed Word and fall asleep feeling loved
Having completed and reflected on this list, I've less of a need to fill up my days with planned activities. I certainly would rather live in the present, be receptive to spirit/Spirit realities, trust God rather than myself, and enjoy walking in the will of God rather than the will of me.
The only church in town will be a place built to facilitate a more honest life lived out in the actualities, or circumstances, of life and Sprit-to-spirit reality. Maybe there we will feel free to pass the peace sign on to each other. ☮
Just for today...
"Today I make a commitment to be honest with myself. By facing reality, I become someone I can depend upon." Courage to Change (p. 232)
"It is easy, terribly easy, to shake a man's faith in himself. To take advantage of that to break a man's spirit is devil's work." (G.B. Shaw: Candida)