October 28th - Engage in Today - the Now

The story...

What does the day look like for you?  I don't know as I write this story, self-aware, in history.  Strangely, that first sentence is in the past and I may need to reread it to remember what I wrote.  I must also remember what the first words of this sentence were in order to understand my intended message.

Today, I'm enjoying the "Just for Today" quotes that were written by others years ago.  They were highlighted as important to me years ago.  I'm considering, and making sense of them, in the present. And, they're conveyed to you from history.  You're enjoying them in the now - the present.

We've got today...

The only church in town will be built on wisdom - they'll focus on reality, where to go, and how to get there.  They'll trust what their Creator and Sustainer has revealed.  And, they'll meet and walk humbly/honestly with Him in the present.

Just for today...

"So it's in my best interest to treat others as I wish to be treated. I try to imagine that my words and actions are being addressed to myself, because in the long run I generally get back what I give out."  Courage to Change (p. 302)

"I've learned that if an issue isn't going to be important in 30 days, then it's probably not worth troubling myself with now."  Hope for Today (p. 302)

"Today is mine, It is unique. Nobody in the world has one exactly like it. It holds the sum of all past experience and the future of all potential."  One Day at a Time (p. 302)

September 30th - Imagining God's Word or what I might worry into existence?

The story...

I read and silently sang songs from a "Young Life" song book this morning.  It was a wonderful imaginary trip into: past experiences, feelings, and glimpses of what might be down the road.

Maybe I've imagined more when I was young - before the reality of the middle chapters of life were written.  The future was unknown then; yet, I question how much I do remember of what actually happened.  My perspectives were limited, there was a lot I didn't see, much I ignored, and certainly spiritual realities that weren't perceivable by my senses.

I can only imagine

The only church in town will work out life within community - one that trusts God's.  A community that's enlightened by the Word of God.  While imagining realities that are only partially witnessed, we're able to experience enough with glimpses of so much more.  "I can only imagine..."

Just for today...

"This day is all I have to work with. The past is over and tomorrow is out of reach."  Courage to Change (p. 274)

Worrying is using your imagination to create a future you don't want.

September 6th - What's really important?

The story...

What's really important today?  I've done a pretty good job of resisting the need to make lists within this blog; yet, this seems like a good place to list what's really important for today - in rank order:

1. Pray and be quiet with God.
2. Love the Lord my God - Abide with my Father in a sort of continual prayer/connection.
3. Be conscience of the Holy Spirit's work as I walk humbly and patiently within the will of God.
4. Eat, breathe, and take care of my body.
5. Love my wife as I love myself.
6. Be joyful, hopeful, peaceful, and bear His fruit.
7. Love, and receive love from, my church community - the body of Christ.
8. Build up key relationships more than they've naturally declined.
9. Interact with neighbors and take opportunities to let'em know they're respected and loved.
10. Blog and continually learn.  Grow to be a better man who trusts God.
11. Read what God says.
12. Maintain and grow the assets that I'm entrusted with.

It's easy for me to see other people not acting out their age and life reality.  I hope that I continue to work out the phase of life that I'm actually in and don't short cut my life story.  I want to be a good character, within the epic story of life, who was and is faithful to his God and Father.

I hope that I remember, each day, that my story's important only because it's worked out within the will of God.  The Holy Spirit indwells me for His biding and He will be resting in the hands of God after my body breathes it's last breath.  Yet, God's promised a new everlasting body for all eternity - we only know this through His revealed Word found in the bible.  I hope that each of us stays curious regarding the spiritual reality that's just as real as our journey on earth yet eternal. 

The only church in town would grow Christ ones who live for today, plan for tomorrow, and think on eternity.  They'd learn to live in the reality that we're eternal beings who're journeying on this orb, earth, for but a few seasons.

Just for today...

"...most people spend more time planning vacations than they do thinking about what is really important in their lives . . . Am I so busy with smaller, less meaningful concerns that I run out of time for the really important considerations?"  Courage to Change (p. 250)

"Perhaps I have felt a right and an obligation to set the standards for the family and compel those around me to live up to them . . . Teach me to leave to others their inborn right to dignity and independence, as I wish to have them leave to me."  One Day at a Time (p. 250)

August 10th - Is it good for you to dwell in the past?

The story...

An unexpected life victory occurred during my 64th year of life.  I traveled on my motorcycle to a location where my family annually vacationed together.  In the past, visits like this, would trigger fond memories that I longed and even ached over.   Camping sites, trails, kids doing similar things, and the scene of  that one time long ago. Often, the longing would be linked with a deep feeling of loss - something that I couldn't return to no matter what.  Yet, on this particular visit, I more fully enjoyed the present.  I didn't forget the past memories but I didn't camp with them either - they seemed to help color the present more vibrantly. 

You might be speculating as to whether the loss of those "good ole day" strong feelings is either good or bad.  Yet, if we spent enough time actually understanding each other, I expect we'd agree that living more fully in our present reality is the better way.

Netflix created a beautiful limited TV series called "The Queen's Gambit."  In one scene, Beth says: "I feel safe in an entire world with just 64 squares."  She developed an obsessive compulsion that helped her cope with reoccurring childhood memories.

I hope that people who attend the only church in town, will be compelled, and feel safe enough, to relax their coping skills. In a more rested and peaceful state, they may resist those compelling habits, and open their eyes more fully as to what's really going on.  They might risk putting their chessboard, with it's 64 spaces, back in the box.  Maybe their soul, mind, and spirt will compel them to pack up their campsite and begin walking again on their life journey.  What a wonderful thing to walk alongside a person who's living life more fully in the present - where God and life are.

Just for today...

"As a child I lived in a fantasy world where to think it so would make it so. Combined with my need for perfectionism and self-control, I believed I could think myself out of reacting emotionally to people and situations.  I carried these misperceptions into adulthood. In my denial, I thought I could make myself not feel anything. I had practiced being tough for a long time."  Hope for Today (p. 223)

July 28th - Living in the present - it takes time to live there.

The story...

"What are you thinking about right now?"  I remember asking that question to multiple people who answered with their response: "nothing."  Since I seemed to be constantly thinking about things, I interpreted their feedback as not being very self-aware, hiding their thoughts, self-medicated, or merely being a non-contemplative personality.  To my knowledge, it never crossed my mind that they might be living in, and experiencing, the "present" as opposed to living in the "past" or "future."

How did I wake up to the value of living in the present?  A significant personal issue led me along a path of brokenness and obsession over probable causes for the turmoil and those who contributed to the problem.  I was obsessing over the situation and it was affecting me negatively - physically, mentally, spiritually, and relationally.  I met with a group of people who had experienced similar life brokenness and they taught me the value of living in the present where life, the Spirit of God, and real relationships are worked out in reality.

I practiced, living in the present, while hiking in the woods.  When obsessive thinking about the past or future began to weigh heavy upon my shoulders, I literally brushed them off with my hand.  I focused on my five senses and experiencing what was going on in my environment, my heart and my spirit too.  The process of "living in the present" took about two years to integrate into the actualities and patterns of my life - what a wonderful change for the whole me.

I've been told that living too much in the past leads to depression and that living too much in the future leads to prolonged anxiety - that rang true to me.  Living in the present, where actual life and God are, clearly seems to be the best way to experience reality, relationships, love, and the seemingly illusive good and satisfying life.  You just might find all joy and hope there too (Romans 15:13).

The people visiting the only church in town may witness love and the value of living within God's presence.  He did all the heavy lifting to forgive all the sin that separated us from living "the good life" in the "present" walking humbly with God (Micah 6:8) - true peace and rest.

Just for today...

"A stonecutter may strike a rock ninety-nine times with no apparent effect, not even a crack on the surface.  Yet with the hundredth blow, the rock splits in two. It was not the final blow that did the trick, but all that had gone before . . . The results may have revealed themselves abruptly, but I know that all those months of faith and hard work made the change possible."  Courage to Change (p. 210)

July 13th - Living in the reality of the "present."

The story...

I remember feeling lonely in August long ago - the hopes and dreams of activities, growth, happiness, and good relationships didn't happen as I hoped.  Sadly, I remember thinking, "well, the summer is over for everybody else too" - it didn't make any difference whether my summer was good or bad.

Sunflower in August

If my current-self could sit down with my old-self, what would I share with him to give him a "jump start" on life?   How might I help him heal the wounds in my old-self's heart?  Sadly, I don't know what I'd say; yet, I believe that I'd express my sincere love for him.  How would he sense and know that love?

Was there a person, who I now know, who knew a better answer to the secrets of a good life?  Was there a book that I could've shared with him?  Might I've shared with him the good stuff that actually would occur in his life?  Should I've told him to invest all of his money into ownership shares of Microsoft so that he would be "all set?"

The good that's come to me was centered on living in the present with a right relationship with God in Christ.  It's good to love God, love myself as He does, and more naturally love other people too.  I imagine a good life kinda looking like that really big sunflower.  Hmm, maybe I'd take my old self to see a field of really big sunflowers and share the reality of my most precious relationship?

The only church in town would be a safe place for that younger version of me to be introduced to the love of God worked out through people with skin on them - those who're still in the world of the living.   A place where true joy and happiness can be found living in the present.

Just for today...

"How many days of my life have I wasted? . . . I rejected overtures of friendship from co-workers so that I could fret, uninterrupted about what was bothering me . . . When my worries and sorrows cloak me, the laughter and sunshine of the everyday world seem inappropriate to the way I feel.  Who is out of sync - the rest of the world or me? . . . Today I will live in the present and find what I can enjoy there."  Courage to Change (p. 195)

July 8th - Life is lived breath by breath...

The story...

In accounting, assets need to balance liabilities with a net sum of zero - life ain't that way.  If I want a particular outcome, or series of events, then I'll always be disappointed.  Yet, if I live in the present and value my relationships; then, my assets can be huge and my liabilities mere needs that can be fulfilled by the grace of God and love extended from others.

The only church in town would be a place where people meet neighbors who are thankful for life and every breath they breathe in the present.  Yes, life is a gift lived out in the present.

A breath of life recorded

I wonder if we'll breathe in eternity?  Will there be darkness when the "Light" is there?

Just for today...

"A great deal can be learned as a result of painful circumstances, but they are not my only teachers. I live in a world of wonders. Today I will pay attention to their gentle wisdom."  Courage to Change (p. 190)

"In those who are still bound to their unhappiness, we hear, beyond their words, angry judgments of the . . . , self pity, and a grim determination to 'win the battle,' no matter what."  One Day at a Time (p. 190)

June 28th - Relationships are found in the present

The story...

Freddy Fender's song "Wasted days and wasted nights" describes a man who's blue due to the choices of the girl which are beyond his control and influence.  He seems camped in his memories where he hoped that things would've been different - if only... then he'd be "all set."  He seems stuck in the past and wasting his present reality.

I wish that I could take back the wasted days and wasted nights of trying to relive the past.  Strangely, my imagined perspective of my past is likely far different from the actual perspectives of those who shared it with me.  To compound the problem further, those who shared your past were likely focused on themselves, only perceived a small part of what was going on, and now likely can't recall anything about those days that were not so important to them.  Are they important to your current reality?

For my momma's birthday present, I loaded up an electronic photo frame with pictures from my mother's past.  It actually creeped me out as I left it on our dining room table prior to giving it to her.  She seemed to have a similar reaction to it too.  Reality, in the present, is the best place to be - that's where your relationships are.  And, the present is where you meet with God too.

The only church in town will work out their faith in the present.  They'll enjoy the presence of God and their savior the Lord Jesus the Christ. 

Just for today...

"I spent most of my life having expectations of , and making unrealistic demands on, everyone around me . . . the person I was hardest on was myself . . . Members encouraged me to eliminate 'have-tos' and 'shoulds' and to slow down so that I could consciously choose which changes felt right to me."  Hope for Today (p. 180)

"My life is too important to be wasted waiting for someone else's choices, even when it's someone I dearly love."  Courage to Change (p. 180)

"How happy and useful I could be if I weren't carrying around such a load of unpleasant emotional turmoil.  No one asks me to, so why do I?"  One Day at a Time (p. 180)

June 24th - What's a Good Life?

 The story...

It's 6:37am and I don't know what'll happen today.  I and others have plans and a will for what we'd like to see happen.  Yet, all our plans don't fit together into that one jigsaw puzzle that'd look like our good day.

As a professor, I was responsible for advising my graduate students regarding their course selections in the light of their career plans and vision for working out their good life.  I rarely heard a good description of what they thought a good life would look like or even if the concept had merit.  Most would ask me: "what is a good life?"

There are some life variables that we've some degree of control over.  We can decide to wake up at 6:00am and set our alarm(s) to increase the likelihood that we do wake up then.  We can forecast what's likely to happen and plan our days accordingly - like checking the weather.  Or, we can react to random variables as they come our way - like the unexpected behavior of other drivers out on the road.

Most likely 24.5 but was 19

The truth is that we can't count on our next breath.  It's truly a remarkable that you are alive and reading this blog posting.  We know that in the next moment we could experience: a stroke, a heart attack, being hit by an object, that head-on crash, that random bullet, catastrophic weather event, being fatally wounded by a rocket or a meteorite...

People within the only church in town will find all joy and peace from the God of Hope (Rom. 15:13). This hope is possible without regard to the wavering circumstances of our lives.  Our sovereign God offers His peace in the midst of life's circumstances for those who are His forever.

Just for today...

• Live more in the present.  
• Listen to others with the intent to understand.  
• Ask people for permission before sharing your perspective.

June 5th - Walking in the Present with God

The story...

I'm walking in the woods.  Am I walking humbly with God?  Am I aware of and receptive to His presence or is my mind moving to and fro between the past and the future?  These walks are my favorite place to consciously walk with God, in the present, as I ascend each hill, turn around each bend, see the sun rays through the leaves, fall into a state of peacefulness, or reflect on the beauty of that vista before I return to my more normal way of life. 

I'm glad I took this picture.

Some say I should buy a camera to better record those "present" moments so that I can later recall them with fondness.  Might these past reflections take me away from the future present?  I've heard it said that too much focus on the past results in depression and that too much attention to the future results in undue anxiety.  We meet with God and people in the present.

People attending the only church in town will likely desire the experience of walking more closely together with God.  Who knows what His will will be for our life today?  It seems reasonable to expect that today will be much like yesterday but change happens - only God knows for sure.  We must say "goodbye" to the past to greet the future with "hello."

Just for today...

"When I open my heart to a Power that fills me with love and acceptance, I can begin to extend those qualities to others."  Courage to Change (p. 157)

"Each new day I turn myself over to God's care because what He does is well done."  Hope for Today (p. 157)

May 8th - One-Minute Chunks of Life

The story...

Yesterday, a friend and I were discussing what it would be like to live close to half of our lives in the 30 second intervals that we might call the "present."  He got a bit uncomfortable with such a short period so we expanded the space to one minute.  It seemed right and good so we purposed to give it a try.  Was the experiment successful?  I don't know, yet I do believe that focusing on the present is worthy.  It's the time period where life's lived.

Blanchard and Johnson wrote a 1980's bestseller book "The One Minute Manager."  The book continues to be popular today.  Apparently, managers do their best too when they're working out their jobs and lives alongside co-workers in the present.  I wonder if that was the author's underlying theme yet my mind missed it as I wandered "to and fro."  

Today my intent will be to live in the 30-second intervals of the present, perceiving more, understanding, and communicating more calmly and purposefully.  Sounds like a good cake recipe.

Momma's birthday cake

Might the only church in town be a place where people might come to experience the present more fully?  I expect that there's a group norm that'll seem to push my behavior towards what's normal; yet, if my life bears fruit, as I walk humbly with God in the now, then maybe what's normal will begin to shift for the whole group?  Visitors might witness life being worked out in the present bearing fruit?

Just for today...

"I don't have to like reality, only to accept it for what it is.  This day is too precious to waste by resenting things I can't change."  Courage to Change (p. 129)

"Over time my plan has shifted from the accomplishments of a lifetime to adjusting my attitude one day at a time.  Instead of considering what I would do with my future, I now choose what I can do in the present."  Hope for Today (p. 129)

"If we surrender to God's guidance, it will cost us our self-will, so precious to us who have always thought we could dominate."  One Day at a Time (p. 129)

April 12th - Enduring Change Takes Time - Be Patient

The story...

My life trajectory's improved significantly in recent years.  The changes came slowly and were worked out alongside other pilgrims.  Those who walked with me seemed more honest with themselves, more okay as they were, and less guarded.

It surprised me that meaningful change took months, rather than weeks, to become more habitual and part of my character.  For example, I learned that I often thought obsessively over problems, issues, and even new ideas.  Obsessive thinking restrained me from engaging in, and enjoying, the present - the "now" where life's actually lived.  Once I witnessed a better way, I assumed that I could change my behavior within 40 days at most - I've often heard it takes 40 days to establish a habit.  It actually took me about six months to actually be different.  I can still be triggered to start up a cycle of obsessive thinking; yet, I often, resolve it within the first 10 min. and return to living in the present.

I hope that the only church in town would accept people just as they are with grace and mercy.  The community would allow others to safely grow at their own pace.  Yes, real growth seems to take longer than expected and requires patience.  Over time, the Spirit of God will begin to bear fruit through their lives.  Some of their old defensive armor, needed to defend themselves, will be exchanged for the far better armor of God.

Just for today...

"You cannot create a statue by smashing the marble with a hammer, and you cannot by force of arms release the spirit or soul of man."  Confucius (551–479 BCE)

"Despair - how many of us suffer from it!  Yet we do not realize that it is purely the absence of faith." One Day at a Time (p. 103)

April 6th - The Rifleman

The story...

I knew a guy, from my dorm floor in college, who I coined the nickname: "The Rifleman."  The nickname stuck and we became pretty-good friends.  We both received hand-held Coleco football games for Christmas.

We began a friendly competition of scoring the most points on the skill-level 1 setting.  I'd set the record and he'd break it the next day.  Other people knew about our "game" and would mention the Rifleman's new high score while passing me on campus - "No way!"  I found that vibrating the eraser-end of a pencil was a good way to speed the red blip across the screen.  He copied me and even improved my method. I tried a variety of pencil erasers to get the best "action."  Inevitably, he'd break each of my records.  My behavior degraded to the point that I found myself in my dorm room, in the middle of a school day, sweating as I attempted to get that more perfect game and attain yet another high score.  That day, a good friend of mine barged into my room.  She was met by my anxious call to "don't bother me now, I've got a good one going!"   They said loudly and directly, "look what you're turning into, do you really want to live like this?"  To my surprise, I was able to see my behavior, in the light of day, and was a bit disgusted with how far I drifted off course - this was the end of my battle with the Rifleman.

How will people in the only church in town know if they're running quickly, maybe recklessly, in the wrong direction?  I'd hope that a leader, or good friend, would recognize that their behavior's outside the will of God and communicate the message in a manner that might be received - shine light on the truth.  For me, it seems that I need to be confronted directly - others may need a more subtle and sensitive approach.

Just for today...

"I used humor as a manipulative tool to get people to like me.  My witty comments were carefully timed.  My sense of humor wasn't spontaneous or appropriate.  I used it to please people.  When no one was around to please, however, I was miserable and self-loathing."  Hope for Today (p. 97)

March 22nd - NOW

The story...

When a person attempts to communicate to me in a sentence, I've to remember the first words in order to make sense of the whole thought.  If short-term memory lasts about 15 to 30 seconds, and occurs in a different part of our brain than long-term memory, then we might say that the "present" occurs within 30-second time intervals.  

Hard to see NOW on a clock

We can avoid living in the present by dwelling on the past or future.  And, we can even avoid the present message inputs and guess what other people are saying based on pre-conceived ideas about who they are or what we want to be true.  Yes, we know that we all can avoid the reality of the present or the NOW.

Why do we choose not to live in the reality of the present, the NOW?  Do we need to be taught how? Maybe it seems boring because we haven't tuned into the reality station and are hearing mostly static.

It seems reasonable to argue that we receive inputs from: our five senses, our feelings, our emotions, our memories, our mind, our hopes, our spirit, and the Spirit of God.  We meet God in the present too and work out actual relationship in the NOW.  Can we be satisfied with merely reading about our potential relationship with God or recalling past times when our relationship seemed to be more meaningful?

The only church in town would be a "safe" place where people would want to be engaged.  They'd witness the value of living in the present reality as opposed to an imagined one that might seem more protective.  They'd interact with the Spirit of God in their own inner-person and witness Him working in others too.

Just for today...

"I will not concern myself about tomorrow until it becomes my today.  The better I use today, the more likely it is that tomorrow will be bright." One Day at a Time (p. 82)

"There is an innocence within me that already knows how to trust God, to cherish life while holding it lightly, to live fully and simply in the present moment."  Courage to Change (p.82)

February 9th - Live for Today

 The story...

The speaker offered me a new way of looking at a good life: LIVE for today; PLAN for tomorrow; and THINK on eternity.  This frame-of-mind seemed to be true, with "face value," and the kind of motto that a wise guy might apply. So, I pondered the motto, shared the value of thinking this way with hundreds of people, yet didn't really internalize it.  Why?  Maybe I didn't spend most of my time living in the present and my thoughts tended to camp out more in the past or future?

How would this motto work out best in the only church in town? What would we witness if we peeked into the church windows or tailed those church people around town?   It's likely that their behavior would exhibit strengths, weaknesses, character flaws and occasionally fruit that they seem to be gifted with. They would be doers who uniquely work out what they know to be true about themselves and God in the present.  Together they would be better equipped to move forward down a good and right path within God's will.  Success, despite their flaws, would bring glory to their God whom they serve.

In my past, I liked sharing the idea of this good way to live while letting my "self" reign over my life.  In my present, I increasingly make doable plans for the near future and trust God with the results.  If we ignore what we do know about "That Than Which There is No Greater" then it seems we also have an unstated plan for traveling down a well worn path that leads us to where we don't want to go. 

Just for today...

"The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak."  This quote and the following painting are from an abstract impressionist painter Hans Hofmann.   Thank you Hans.

February 3rd - Living in the Present

 The story...

I started school younger than my peers and grew up shorter and more gangly too.  I imagined and hoped for what I might look like when I grew up - then I'd fit in and be more loved and respected.  Tall, big chested, riding a thundering-black motorcycle, playing the trumpet better than anyone else, and experiencing true love and total acceptance from "her."

How might the one church in town have taught me to accept and love myself as I was - in the present?  To work out who I was in realty - more independent and secure - positioned to be interdependent with others. 

Life clearly only occurs in the present yet I've spent way to much time dreaming of the future and trying to make sense of, or even trying to change, the past.  How could the spiritual leaders and church community have facilitated my being pulled more into the present?  Were they able to share the actualities of their reality?   Is it possible that they tried but I couldn't hear?  Was my selfish nature so guarded and cemented that I was unable to grow until "X" years of life experience?

Just for today...

How do we accept our physical appearance?  If you love yourself as God loves you in Christ then you are free to accept yourself and others too - just the way we are. Does that sound a bit like Jane Eyre?

"I pray for the wisdom to understand my difficulties clearly and honestly, and for the strength to do something constructive about them.  I know that I can count on God's help in this."  One Day at a Time (p. 34)

December 22nd - Being aware an engaging in the present

The story...

I wonder how much of our thinking life is actually spent thinking about the past (maybe 20%), engaging in the present reality (maybe 50%), or thinking about future realities (maybe 30%)?  Given enough time, I expect that we all would agree that it's best to live in the present where life actually occurs.  If we did so, I expect that our memories would be richer, and our future moments better lived.

A group of friends, and a book, introduced me to the benefits of living more fully in the present where life actually occurs.  They introduced me to the acronym S.T.E.A.M.: Senses, Thoughts, Emotions, Actions, and Mindfulness.  I practiced mindfulness by going through each of the letters when I found myself excessively reliving the past or worrying about future possibilities - I often did this on hiking trails.  First, I checked my five senses.  Second, I examined my current thoughts.  Third, I identified my emotions.  Fourth, I was honest with what I was doing.  Lastly, I enjoyed the peacefulness of rightly living in the present - being mindful.

Yes, I painted this...

The only church in town will introduce you to the spiritual realities that may have previously escaped your detection.  Yes, God communicates and works out life, with His creation, in the present.  So... I added an "S" to the acronym, S.T.E.A.M.S., to stand for my spirit and God's Spirit relating within the unseen spiritual reality.  Yes, there is a spirit/Spirit reality.  Why not pray now, one-on-one with God, and together within the only church in town?

Best definition of wisdom I've ever heard:  "Live for today, plan for tomorrow, and think on eternity."

Just for today...

The Contemplative Life:  "...prayer is available any time, any place. It is undetectable to outside eyes, but it bears a seed of transformation that can bring the most unmanageable situation into perspective."  Courage to Change (p. 357)

"I wondered how I could pray without feeling false . . . my rigidity was a wall that hid my fear . . . Now I am gentler with myself and others.  Acceptance of my self-doubts enabled me to start turning away from the "musts" and "shoulds."  Hope for Today (p. 357)