September 16th - Worry = Imagined fears worked into reality?

The story...

I'm tagging along with my mother as she shopped at the Fareway Grocery store.  She wasn't one to quickly fulfill our wants so we walked past the bins of penny candy without discussion.  One day, I willed to stuff a piece of candy into my pocket.  I saw the mirrors on the walls and knew that there was a risk that I'd be caught - I just did it.  I must have been sweating when I waited in the checkout line - I know that I fretted over the decision for days or longer.  I don't know how I resolved the moral dilemma - maybe I never did.  

How does a 4-year old boy resist?

I can remember this theft over sixty years later so it must have been an important "incident" on my mental record of who I am.  Am I good or bad?  Did I return it and toss it back into the bin?  Did I offer to pay the one cent?  Did I confess the sin and ask for forgiveness?  Did I try to do more good stuff to outweigh my failure?  Did I just push my misdeed out of my consciousness and stuff it within the recesses of my mind?

I believe that this incident occurred before I accepted an invitation to trust God's great work in Christ for the forgiveness of my sin.  Being right with God empowered me to walk more humbly and rightly with Him.  What might I've done had I stole the candy after I accepted God's provision for my sin?  Would I have confessed this known sin in my prayers, thanked Him for forgiving me for my sin through Christ, and restored the most important relationship that sin separates?  I do know that God knows our hearts better than we do and that no man is good - scripture says so.  His will works out with or without me.  I'm so thankful that God loves me in Christ - I'm walking through life with Him.  Man that's good news.

The only church in town will be the place where you can hear the real good news.  It's a place to worship God together.  It's a place to learn about Him, His revealed Word, us, the future, and true love too.  It's a place to develop the relationships that seem to be a big part of the recipe for your "good" life.  No need to fear and worry that fear into a bad reality.  

Why not trust God and actually live out a good-to-great life within His will?  If that's your will, then why not engage in that only church in town?

Just for today...

"They plead the worst case scenario in a very convincing way, until it almost seems frivolous to consider a positive outcome.  Yet the loudest voice is not necessarily the truest." Courage to Change (p. 260)

"Let me not force my own certainties on others. I could be wrong. A generous tolerance can smooth out many rough places in my day-to-day living." One Day at a Time (p. 260)

September 4th - Do I worry to control the uncontrollable?

The story...

What if we had one day per week where we didn't plan anything?   We could pray, listen, exercise, rest, care for ourselves and others, and enjoy relationships.  How about being flexible with our schedules, resisting engaging in other's business, and living a more joyful, peaceful and hope-filled day?

Some of you might be thinking: "I'd like to be like that yet it's impossible - the other people in my life don't behave like that."  Might a more fruitful life spill over into their lives too and be a sort of engine drawing others towards the good stuff of life?

How might we better respond when we feel a need to be more okay by controlling our environment or interactions among other people?   Developing, sharing, or arguing, opinions is an alternative yet likely won't get us where we want to go.

The only church in town will communicate God's revealed truth - God has a will for creation and for you and me too.  You'll hear there that He will work out His will with me or without me.  Yet, He enjoys me and His creation and has good news for all humanity.  His Son, our Lord and Savior Jesus the Christ, has paid our debt for the trespasses that kept us apart from out Creator.  A life walking with Him is much better than the losing battle of  trying to glorify and protect ourselves.   We can be brought close to Him through faith and trust through the great redeeming work of His Son.  Wow, I can only inadequately imagine what eternity will be like with God.

Just for today...

"I was surprised to find myself still grabbing for old fears as if I wanted to remain in crisis. I realized that I didn't know how to feel safe unless I was mentally busy. When I worried, I felt involved - and therefore somewhat in control."  Courage to Change (p. 248)

"Some of us, after long enduring misfortunes we didn't know how to cope with, reached a breaking point. In our hopelessness we even felt rejected by God, so we never thought of turning to Him for help."  One Day at a Time (p. 248)

"Do you take note when others are sick and offer them the same attention you crave? . . . Let it begin with me."  Hope for Today (p. 248)

November 23rd - Fear: name 'em, decide, move forward, and put 'em away

The story...

My lumbar defects are my current physical problem(s) that can easily lead me to feel anxiety, whine, and succumb to fear for the present and future.  I know that this type of fear can cause our exceptionally strong back muscles to tighten up around our spines.  I'm told this "tightening" exasperates the problem, which can accelerate the degradation, and potentially lead to subtle, yet unrepairable, nerve damage.  So, worrying doesn't just "not hurt" but causes ongoing, and potentially ongoing, "hurt."

Worrying, anxiety and fear clearly are not okay for back pain.  Yet, I wonder why worrying, anxiety, and fear are ever warranted.  Truly these emotions can spur us on towards that first step towards a better course of action, or being, that we would enjoy - better circumstances.  It took me about a week to stop whining about this resurrected pain of the type I felt before -about 15 years ago.  Yet, it seems better to acknowledge emotions, make sense of them, and then put 'em away when their purpose is fulfilled.

With regards to my back problems; the medical system is designed to do what I can't do for myself - true the process needs my attention and involvement; but, they intervene to effect the change.  Most people, working me through the process, seem to love me along the way as they give me what I need - that's a real good part of life - kinda like receiving love.

There are some truths about life that I don't want to face today.  For those, a reasonable amount of anxiety will help me remember and motivate me to take action - to move forward or change.  It does make sense to be "in tune" with our emotions.  Taking that first step can be real hard.  I'm thankful for friends who can help us shine the light of reality on our conditions - I have a history with people caring for me and their kind intervention is interpreted, by me, as love.

Many of the people within the only church in town will be "okay" enough to listen to, and care for, their fellow pilgrims.  They'll hear their fellow's words, emotions, self stories, and share together about the better reality of being and walking rightly with God  (Micah 6:8).

Just for today...

"Just for today I will not be afraid of anything. If my mind is clouded with nameless dreads, I will track them down and expose their unreality . . . God is in charge of me and mine."  One Day at a Time (p. 328)

"I kissed her tears away, the way I wanted her to do for me when I was a child . . . I held her, and we cried together in joy and love."  Hope for Today (p. 328)

September 30th - Imagining what God said or what I might worry into existence?

The story...

I read and silently sang songs from a "Young Life" song book this morning.  It was a wonderful imaginary trip into past experiences, feelings, and with glimpses of what might be down the road.

Maybe I imagined more when I was young - before the reality of the middle chapters of life were written.  The future was unknown then; yet, I question how much I do know of what actually happened in the past that I partially experienced.  There was a lot that I didn't see, much that I ignored, and certainly spiritual realities that weren't meant for my eyes.

I can only imagine

The only church in town will work out life within community - one that trusts God.  A community that's enlightened by the Word of God.  While imagining realities that are only partially witnessed, we're able to experience enough with glimpses of so much more.  "I can only imagine..."

Just for today...

"This day is all I have to work with. The past is over and tomorrow is out of reach."  Courage to Change (p. 274)

Worrying is using your imagination to create a future you don't want.

September 27th - The virus story worked out - wasn't worth fretting over

The story...

I've had virus symptoms for 2.5 weeks.  I'll call my doctor this morning since I've passed the two-week limit.  He likely will not be able to identify the virus - he might prescribe an anti-viral drug to boost my immune system.  I don't like my condition and I've only a basic understanding of immune systems.  So after acknowledging that last sentence, I listened to three YouTube introductory videos on the immune system.  I learned some of the principals that help me appreciate my body even more and to identify some of my behaviors and misunderstandings that may have hindered me.

He listened to my symptoms and physically inspected me - he had an intern with him too who repeated some of the checks.  He asked for two blood test samples to be taken to both check my immune system and to search for wasted muscle - he has an idea of what it might be yet didn't tell me.  I was able to have my blood samples taken at 3:30pm 9/01/2023.

It's 9/05/2023 and I'm hoping to get the results of my blood test this morning.  These data will help my doctor prescribe a course of action to better my body and the life I live through it.  I have speculated much over the last three days.  I know in part yet I'll likely know much more in a few hours.

The virus continued on, I visited my primary physician once again and he asked for more blood tests.  The type of virus was never really known. I began to feel better after five weeks and am now symptom free.

Suffering will be found in the only church in town yet, it won't be their focus.  They'll focus on the truth of God's good news and the blessings that are found by living out each day in the "Light" of day.

Just for today...

"If my life has become unmanageable, how can I get control of it? Am I being forced into doing things I don't want to do, like losing my temper, contriving, conniving and scheming to make things work out the way I want them?"  One Day at a Time (p. 271)

"If thou canst not make thyself such a one as thou wouldst, how canst thou expect to have another according to thy liking?"  Thomas Kempis - The Imitation of Christ

"If I knew what was coming, I suspect that I would spend all my time trying to run from painful experiences instead of living. I would miss out on so much great stuff." Courage to Change (p. 271)