July 19th - Why didn't you just ask?

The story...

I first saw it while I quickly ran down the stairs on Christmas morning.  There it was!   It was blue, my favorite color, shiny, big and a 5-speed.  My parents got me a man-sized bike for Christmas!  I don't remember begging for it yet I might've.  Maybe my mother felt my need when she saw that other kids had full-sized bikes and that I was still riding the hand-me-down bike.  Maybe they felt obligated to give it to me because they did the same for my older siblings.  It was a real need and it was met well.  It might've been part of the reason that I accepted a paper route that I kept for four years.  That paper route helped shape me into a better, more capable, person.  The paper route prepared me to accept my job as the drug-store delivery boy.  And the drug-story delivery boy job prepared me for...  Yes, that bike was a need that was worth asking for.

Mine wasn't a Schwinn but it did have a rack on the back.

I wanted so many things that I didn't ask for.  Why?  Maybe, I didn't' think that people would want to give them to me.  Or, I was comfortable with the way things were even though they weren't great.  Maybe, I developed coping skills that told me that I was better off than others and I didn't need anything - they were wrong and I was right.  Or, I didn't know if I was capable of using the thing if I got it.  Maybe, if I got it, I might lose it someday. Or, maybe I simply feared rejection.  Maybe, I wanted to be loved above all other things and the "no" answer would move the possibility of being loved even further away...

The only church in town would be a safe place where your need for love might best be understood and at least partially fulfilled.   Yes, our ultimate need is to love the Lord our God with all our heart, mind and strength.  And, to love our neighbor as ourself.  That kind of stuff sounds real good and worthy of asking for.

Just for today...

"If I want or need something, I have to let someone know.  I need to ask, which means taking risks.  Maybe my request will be granted; maybe it won't.  If it is, great. If it isn't, I'll still feel better for having asked, and then I can move on to someone else who might be able to help me."  Hope for Today (p. 201)

"Walls are solid and rigid; they keep others out, and they keep me trapped inside.  Boundaries are flexible, changeable, removable, so it's up to me how open or closed I'll be at any given time.  They let me me decide what behavior is acceptable, not only from others but from myself."  Courage to Change (p. 201)