November 16th - God help me!

The story...

My soul ached with hurt, pain, and sadness.  It slowly built up until it felt like a balloon under pressure - it had to be released before it burst.  I learned to express my pain, strong emotions, and request for relief aloud - I mean really loud.  It helped to be home alone, deep in the woods on a hike, or even alone at the end of our pier that juts out into Lake Michigan.  I'd let my pain rip - praying earnestly, and loudly, for resolution, grace, mercy, justice, or healing.  My outward expression of my inner condition seemed right and good - the crying out often left me being more peaceful, content and thankful.

The only church in town will cry out to the Lord in times of distress and need - scripture says He hears and has the power to act according to what's best for each person and community too (Psalms 119:169; 142:1; Ezekiel 9:4; Matthew 20:30; Acts 7:60; and Hebrews 5:7).  He wants us to pray even though He doesn't really need us to - it's something about our relationship.  The only church in town will cry out in thankfulness and praise as they see God's faithfulness, love, and unlimited power worked out.

Just for today...

"It seems strange, when I think of it, that God is most vivid to my consciousness when I am in the depths of despair, and all I can say to Him is: 'God help me!'"  One Day at a Time (p. 319)

"You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might pray also in the fulness of your joy."  Kahlil Gibran: The Prophet

"Life pressed on; Stooped of strain - Cried to LORD; Relieve my pain!"
"Lingers on; Sustain He can - Trusting His; Far-better man."   Am I a Poet?

October 27th - Be quiet - tune into what's really going on

The story...

In group prayer, I've often found myself thinking about my turn to pray and what's the best thing for me to share.  Some people's prayers were helpful and others weren't according to my ideas of what prayer should be.  Recently, I began both resting in prayer groups and quieting my mind - sometimes I don't pray aloud at all.  Other times, I'm more attentive to the Spirit of God working His way out through another person's prayers that previously seemed odd or "off the mark."  The change has been good for me and possibly the groups too.

Scripture says that the Holy Spirit indwells and works out through the life of believers who're right with God in Christ.  Therefore, He's present and speaking amongst many of those within the group - silently and sometimes in words.  I expect that the full group is strengthened when acknowledging and tuning into the presence of God within their midst. 

Be quiet and tune into what's really going on.

The only church in town will be filled with the Holy Spirit - indwelling those who are trusting in Christ.  Even though our bodies don't have sensors to clearly perceive the spiritual realities that're presently working - they're there.  Maybe poetry captures some of that unseen reality that's hard to capture with words,

Just for today...

"I often feel closest to God when I hear others share about how well God has taken care of them. Today I try to remember that there is enough love for us all."  Courage to Change (p. 301)

"I will remind myself that the only vital thing is to apply what I have learned - to make it work for me in all the happenings of my daily life . . . keep hands off what is truly none of my business."  One Day at a Time (p. 301)

"Heart senses; Presence known - Silently experience; Abiding love."   Am I a Poet?

July 4th - Will somebody sit next to me?

The story...

I sat next to a woman on a train to Milwaukee one day.  Unexpectedly, we shared much of the important parts of our lives.  Kristen let me know that she had her eye removed with hopes of eradicating the cancer in her body; yet, she recently discovered that the cancer traveled to her liver.  There was no known cure for that type of cancer.  She participated in a sort of holistic program to extend her life with the hope that a new, yet unknown solution, might materialize.

She was a positive person with much support in her life.   We discussed living in 3-month intervals; the pros and cons of hoping for a miracle; difficulties related to thinking about future plans; and the important parts of life that might make a difference into eternity.  I think that we encouraged each other and were both better off for having met and listened to each other with open hearts.  I'm glad that I chose to sit next to her.  I wrote a prayer card and placed it in my prayer box.  I hope that she lives a long fruitful life yet I'll probably never know - we shared only our first names.  I wish now we would have traded e-mail addresses.

The only church in town would likely be a place where congregates might expect conversations regarding life's challenges and eternal realities with open, honest, and humble God-trusting people.  Human wisdom and hope have limited value when interment is in view.

Just for today...

• Value each person we meet - it's a miracle that each of us is alive.
• Be open to God's leading and resist temptations to be your own little god.
• Seek to understand them - you might open an opportunity to both give and receive love.

"Body of Christ; Here today - Community built; His Way."   Am I a Poet?

June 30th - God knows what I'm trying to say

The story...

I wonder how often I prayed when I was young.  What did I pray about?  I don't remember expectations that I knelt beside my bed with my hands folded.  Maybe I laid in bed making pleas for answers to the dilemmas that each day presented.  I do remember sleeping on the bottom bunk looking at the airplanes printed on the fabric below the top bunk - I did often imagine flying.  My needs were never fully met and I hope I was thankful for the what and the whom in my life.  

I look back now with thankfulness for all of the life changes that came my way - the good, the bad and the...   My relationship with God is closer than ever and my life is generally peaceful.  I can imagine how God might enjoy me and our relationship.  Yes, I greatly value my human experience and have inklings of how they might be valued and useful within the next life or realm.

Scripture confirms that God knows a  man's heart better than any man does.  It seems that God enjoys and responds to our conversations with Him.  The only church in town will teach people to pray - to work out a right relationship with God the Father through our Savior our Lord Jesus the Christ.  I'm so thankful that my parents brought me to church where I learned Who God was, what He revealed for us, and how to pray.

Just for today...

"As a child I seldom felt as though I had enough of anything - especially love , attention, and approval.  It seemed no matter what my parents said or did, I always wanted more.  As and adult I tried to get my needs met in other ways.  I ate too much, thinking I could fill my empty spaces with food.  I shopped in too many stores, searching for the  elusive merchandise that would finally make me feel complete.  I sought 'substitute parents' whose attention and approval would make me feel good about my life and myself."  Hope for Today (p. 182)

"'Why are you saying your ABCs so many times?' I asked the boy.  He replied, 'I'm saying my prayers.' I couldn't help but laugh. 'Prayers.? All I hear is the alphabet.' Patiently the boy explained, Well, I don't know all the words, so I give God the letters. God knows what I am trying to say.'"  Courage to Change (p. 182) 

"Squint to see; Truth or error - Seems real; Vanity fair?"
"Kneel to hear; Wait in peace - Take next step; Wonder ne'er cease."
"Prophets heard; Had to tell - I believe; All is well."                          Am I a Poet?

June 25th - Why do I resist prayer?

The story...

I was trained to be an industrial engineer (IE).  One of my IE tasks was to plan for the capacity to produce products.  I learned people learn new processes and systems at predictable rates.  Their speed of learning may be modeled by a constant percentage every time they double the total number of parts they've produced to date.  The multiplier will be at about 80% for simple assembly work and up to 95% for more complex work.  For an 80% manual-job learning curve, this rule-of-thumb would project that a 10 min. time for the 50th part would be reduced to 8 min. for the 100th part.  The idea is right even if my facts are a tad off.

So, what's the learning curve look like for my prayer life?  My capacity to pray and time I spent praying doesn't fit the learning curve model.   First, I don't remember being taught to pray.  My family often recited a version of the prayer Jesus taught His disciples before meals - I remember it as follows:

"Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory forever, AMEN."  Luke 11:1-13  

I've listened to other people pray aloud - their prayers were addressed to themselves, the prayer group, God, Jesus, and sometimes to no one in particular.  My prayer history had ebbs and flows, desert and rainy seasons, anxiety and peace, new truth and despair, full acceptance and lost, long and short, revelation and no sense of change, quiet and loud, on my knees or speeding, one-way and two-way, natural and foreign, loving and left outside, trusting and questioning...

I wish I'd prayed more.  I'm going to pray right down and tell you what happened when I'm done.  Here it goes...

I prayed for 8 min. 5 sec. My heart was right, I praised and thanked God.  I made my requests known for others. I was quiet for about a third of the time and felt emotions and physical feeling within my body too.  It felt good and right - a place where I want to be.  Yet, as I'm typing I've returned to my life journey.  My prayer respite is but a memory.  I wonder how that prayer might've affected lives and God's intervention.  We may never know the answer to questions like these.  Yet, God has revealed that prayer's critical towards our relationship and receipt of His lovingkindness. 

Yes, the only church in town would be a place of prayer.  People would work out increasingly reliant relationships with our God and seek Him and His will in prayer.  If we were prayerful sorts, might we enjoy each other more?  He's faithful.

Just for today...

"Am I too busy too pray? Have I no time for meditation? Then let me ask myself whether I have been able to solve my problems without help."  One Day at a Time (p. 177)

"Eyes on me; I insist - Quiet with Him; I resist."
"Wanna but don't; Why's it so? - Peacefully praying; Best we know."   Am I a Poet?

June 7th - Let it be heard - lament

The story...

I've had the joy of meeting weekly with a group of men while we studied the bible.  One Monday night we were considering the lamentations of the prophet Jeremiah who lived 40 years warning Jerusalem of God's pending judgment.   The people, temple, palace, city, law, festivals, and land would be punished for not being the called out group of people that God required.  A remnant of 4,600 people would be exiled to Babylon for 70 years to cleanse the people and the land from the effects of sin.  Jerimiah lamented deeply - he's known as the weeping prophet.

All life involves suffering.  Ignoring, pretending and hiding seem to be reasonable ways to cope; yet, they run rife with bad consequences.  Bottled up emotions and pretending are no way to live a good life either.  God's Word say He knows our heart and hears our prayers that cry out with the pain inflicted from both our personal and collective sin. 

The only church in town would be acutely aware that they're living in a cursed world.  People need to be restored when sin inflicts it's damage.  Real freedom and love are offered to us by God through faith in His great work in Christ.  Yet, the pain and sufferings of life take their toll.  God hears our lamenting and loves those who walk faithfully beside Him within the only church in town.

The Passion Of The Christ - Tear Drop From God

Why not go to a quiet place and let it out today?

Just for today...

"Courtesy . . . is an expression of love, warm concern for the other person's comfort, peace of mind and well being . . . The practice of courtesy in the home gives us many opportunities each day to convey our love in little ways."  One Day at a Time (p. 1'59)

"When I turn off one feeling, I shut off all the others . . .  Sobbing, wailing, lamenting - all different ways of discharging my pain so that I can heal - allow me to experience the strength of my aliveness."  Hope for Today (p. 159)

"Mood chemicals flow; Might feel blue - Must I react; Are they true?"
"Wonderful sensors; Super-hero tall - Fully human; Feelings an all."   Am I a Poet?

May 28th - Need - Pray - Trust - Wait - Praise - Thankfulness - Peace

The story...

I've a prayer box where I place scraps of paper with recorded prayers that I'm trusting God with.  I open the box, every month or so, and am consistently surprised at the answers I see.  Unexpected answers for each request.   If I was a little god, I'd never have planned the situations to work out the way they did.  I'm thankful that I left them with God and resisted the urge to intervene to "help" them.

The only church in town would pray for their hopes and needs and trust God for outcomes.  Later, when they open their "prayer box" they'd find unexpected blessings and glimpses of the light and presence of God.

Just for today...

"I have heard it said that the only valid comparisons are between myself as I am and myself as I used to be."  Courage to Change (p. 148)

"God, please help me be willing to be willing."  Hope for Today (p. 149)

"Branch in vine; Suck sap'n grow - Pruner cuts back; Hurts ya know."
"Sun licks wounds; New growth shows - Better and bigger; Fruit overflows."    Am I a Poet?

March 29th: Pray Continually?

The story...

I assumed it was some type of extreme idea or hyperbole: "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. NASB)   How could a man be in continual contact with God?  Is that the will of God?  

Later in life, I found this truth worked out in reality - sensing and observing an ongoing relationship between the Spirt of God and my spirit.  Being truly awake and alert to the reality of the present.  This "relationship" has been real to me albeit veiled, seen rather dimly, with bursts of revealing light.  Fruit born is more concrete and observable.  That type of fruit seems to come without all the turmoil that accompanies my efforts of "trying to be a good boy."  The greatest commandment worked out?

I've heard that being right with God, and walking humbly with Him, is like finally discovering the oil reserve deep below your house.  You notice it bubbling out of the ground.  Then one day you decide to pump it out of the ground and use it thereafter.  The idea of using your untapped resource is acted out in the opening credits for one of the best TV shows of all time.

The only church in town would teach God's revealed Word and the people would work out their faith in God's Word together.  They'd walk alongside each other as they learn to abide in Christ - the process is much slower than I ever expected.  One day, they might naturally experience unceasing prayer.  Each of them would be different, in their own unique and gifted way, yet together they'd be awesome in Christ.  

Just for today...

"I lost my conscious contact with God. I gained weight, stopped exercising, and lost interest in my home and family.  I started isolating, and I sank into depression."  Hope for Today (p. 89)

"Worrying and fear can alter our perceptions until we lose all sense of reality, twisting neutral situations into nightmares.  Because most worry focuses on the future, if we can learn to stay in the present, living one day or one moment at at time, we take positive steps toward warding off our fear."  Courage to Change (p. 150)

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus."  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. (NASB)

"Life's amok; Quit trying - Trusted God; We're okay."   Am I a Poet?

February 17th - A place to pray

 The story...

Do you have a place to pray?  What triggers your prayer habit?  In the past, my knees hurt due to bursitis.  I ordered my kneeling pad one day and received it the next - the delivery speed continues to amaze me.  It was comfortable, I could slide it under my bed, and it worked.  It surprised me that both seeing the pad and thinking about the pad triggered a prayer response - that seems good.

How would a place to pray work out in the only church in town?  I expect that the doors would mostly be open for those who are compelled to kneel in the quietness of a sanctuary.  Scripture says that we can live a life of continuous prayer without going into the church building - abiding in a sort of constant communication - in a relationship.  Yet, we know there are times when we need to shut out the cares of the world and go to a place where we can kneel down in quiet.   It'd be a place that triggers a restorative experience of worship, praise, thanking, asking, receiving and listening.  What a good place to "be."

Just for today...

"Faith takes practice.  Fears can loom large and I can get lost in my limited thinking.  When I can't see any way out and I doubt that even God can help me, that's when I most need to pray."    Courage to Change (p. 48)

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus."  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NASB)

"Bent knees low; Opened heart's ears - All's ordered; Fellowship restored."    Am I a Poet?

January 8th - Being quiet with God - "the" place to be

The story...

Oh... to be rightly related with God, enjoying who He is, and expectantly sensing His presence.  We may sense Him within: creation, other people, His revealed Word, fruit born through us, or the indwelling Spirit of Christ.  That's where I want to be.  Let's be quiet today - open ears, mind, and heart.

The only church in town will share the reality of God; our Creator; and our extraordinary life pilgrimage we're designed to walk by faith and hope in Christ.  We can leave the cares of the world aside, abide in Christ, and bear His fruit until that last breath when we're separated from our earthly bodies (John 15:4).

Just for today...

"During my daily quiet time, I try to focus all my attention on God. When I take my problems to Him, I try to leave them there and keep my focus of attention on Him."  As We Understood (p. 196)

"Big deal; Part I take - Trust His care; For our sake."   Am I a Poet?

December 25th - Be quiet - replace what-ifs with even-ifs

 The story...

I'm lifting weights in my basement while listening to an inspiring message from one of my mentors on YouTube.  I complete my stretching and turn off the TV.  I kneel down, on my weight bench, in prayer and meditation.  Then, I'm quiet and peaceful for a time, maybe the best part of life, then it's quickly over.  Why?

Being quite in prayer, meditating, is a great place to be - peacefulness.  Why's it illusive?  I will to be quiet and peaceful following prayer with my heart open to the Spirit of God.  Yet, my mind, often filled with the cares of the world, seems crouched on the sideline, ready to pounce back in and continue running the show.  These are the those thoughts of: having to, wanting to, planning to, worrying about, interested in, and even whimsically entertaining myself - an endless stream of possibilities just waiting to be juggled around and explored.  Might my "what-ifs" be replaced with "even-ifs?"  If our focus shifted from trying to control and worry about what might happen to trusting God "even if;" then, might we live in a more peaceful place and make better decisions too?

The only church in town will introduce those assembled to the Word of God and the opportunity to experience fellowship with their Creator too - wow.  Faith in God means trusting Him to keep His Word - He's faithful.  Yes, His Word lived out in me is the very best both for the few years I've left and for all eternity too.  Yes, it's reasonable and right to replace our "what-ifs" with "even-ifs" when we're right with God in Christ.  That's an infinitely better place to be than merely trying my best, on my own, to control the uncontrollable.  

Merry Christmas - we have a wonderful Savior in Christ!  Praise God!  We're far more than okay in Christ.

Just for today...

"Serenity is: . . .  accepting my many characteristics and not judging what's 'bad' or 'good' but what's useful to keep and what to release . . . honoring my feelings without aiming them at someone else or letting them run my life."  Hope for Today (p. 360)

"What message does my silence communicate? Today I will try to align the stillness of my tongue with a stillness of spirit."  Courage to Change (p. 360)

"What if; We'd suffer - Be His; Even if."
"Courageous power; Humbly born - Abiding Christ; Forever more."   Am I a Poet?

December 22nd - Aware an Engaged Now

The story...

I wonder how much of our "thinking life" is actually spent in the past (maybe 20%), engaging in the present reality (maybe 50%), or about future possibilities (maybe 30%)?  Given enough time, I expect that we'd agree that it's best to live in the present where life actually occurs.  If we do so, I expect our memories would be richer, and our future better lived.

A group of friends, and a book, introduced me to the benefits of living more fully in the present where life actually occurs.  They introduced me to the acronym S.T.E.A.M.: Senses, Thoughts, Emotions, Actions, and Mindfulness.  I practiced mindfulness by going through each of the letters when I found myself excessively reliving the past or worrying about future possibilities - I often did this on hiking trails.  First, I checked my five senses.  Second, I examined my current thoughts.  Third, I identified my emotions.  Fourth, I was honest with what I was doing.  Lastly, I enjoyed the peacefulness of rightly living in the present - being mindful.

Yes, I painted this...

The only church in town will introduce you to the spiritual realities that may have previously escaped your detection.  Yes, God communicates and works out life, with His creation, in the present.  So... I added an "S" to the acronym, S.T.E.A.M.S., to stand for my spirit and God's Spirit relating within the unseen spiritual reality.  Yes, there is a spirit/Spirit connection.  Why not more fully live by praying now, one-on-one with God, and together within the only church in town?

Just for today...

The Contemplative Life:  "...prayer is available any time, any place. It is undetectable to outside eyes, but it bears a seed of transformation that can bring the most unmanageable situation into perspective."  Courage to Change (p. 357)

"I wondered how I could pray without feeling false . . . my rigidity was a wall that hid my fear . . . Now I am gentler with myself and others.  Acceptance of my self-doubts enabled me to start turning away from the "musts" and "shoulds."  Hope for Today (p. 357)

"Living today; Planning tomorrow - Thinking eternity; Joy from sorrow."   Am I a Poet?