October 25th - It's going to be what it's going to be - let it go

The story...

A wise boss once told me to focus on the 20% of the stuff that's within my control, or that I can strongly influence, to get the best results - the essentials.  Let the random variables bounce around within limits and trust our capable people to address the minor issues as they arise.   Our competitors can waste their time focused on the trivial and wear themselves out trying to control the uncontrollable - "We'll eat their lunch."

Steven Covey developed a useful model of three concentric circles that illustrates how we might best classify issues within our mind.  The innermost circle contains issues that are within our control - it's small.  The next bigger circle contains the issues that we can influence - it's bigger.  The next bigger circle are those issues that we are concerned about yet we can't influence or control.

Circles of: Concern, Influence, and Control

Stephen Covey idea

The only church in town will focus on the essentials for growing each person and the group too.  They'll speak to concerns outside their influence and control yet they won't stay there.  They'll trust the power of God to work out His will in those matters - He's fully capable and trustworthy of managing His creation.  His circles have no boundaries.

Just for today...

"One of my defects of character is to make choices passively - letting things happen rather than taking action."   Courage to Change (p. 299)

"... weather was one of the many things completely out of my control.  This perception relieved me of responsibility for the weather, sunny or cloudy, and reminded me of the many things in life over which I have no control. I can only let go and let them be."   Hope for Today (p. 299)

March 26th - Embrace Variation

The story...

Within this world there're random variables - like the size of an egg, the length of the hairs on your head, the amount of rain in April, or the chances you'll get all green stop lights on the way to work.  Environments, materials, people and processes are continuously varying.  The same process setup, and efforts to perform the same way, result in different outcomes - variation.  Many differences are obvious yet some require you to look more closely.  The need to manage and control this type of variation is why manufacturing companies have "Quality" jobs.

Calipers: 0.001" precision

Once upon a time, I was a quality professional - one of the guys responsible for managing and controlling variation.  On a particular sunny spring day, I attended a seminar, in an old house, away from the "plant."  I still remember the instructor introducing Larry Wall's Harvard Law.  The law states: "Under controlled conditions of light, temperature, humidity, and nutrition, the organism will do as it damn well pleases."  The futility of my struggles to control our processes, beyond what they were capable of, was exposed!  This was a key learning for me to embrace.  I expect I've retold that internalized learning 100's of times.

The same can be said for the only church in town.  People vary day-to-day, year-to-year, and season to season.  The community, town, county, state, national, and global environments are always changing.  Special causes of variation occur in the church regularly.  Your new youth group leader may love to mountain climb and the youth learn to work out their faith in Appalachia.  Leadership may have different view points on non-essential doctrines yet they love, respect and grow together.  Two families from a different culture join your church and the people grow in different ways.  Trying to stay the same and control variation will likely just wear you out and frustrate others.  Change is going to happen - why not embrace it?

Thank God that His Word does not change.  His promises are real, trustworthy and the best by definition.  Best of all, you can count on Him to keep His promises.  

Just for today...

"If I'm unwilling to perform a task badly, I can't expect to make progress toward learning to do it well."  Courage to Change (p. 86)

"Refraining from advice-giving or criticizing creates an accepting and respectful environment in which each member is truly heard and valued.  Hope for Today (p. 86)

"Progress begins when we stop trying to control the uncontrollable and when we go on to correct what we have the right to change."  One Day at a Time (p. 86)

November 29th - Trying to control the uncontrollable? Why?

The story...

The weather is going to vary.  We can attempt to control it by moving to a new spot on the globe yet it will vary there too.  It's true that we can influence the weather but can we really control it?  

We're better able to plan for weather variation in our homes.  We can look at the short-term forecast and  plan accordingly.  Many change their home's environment using: a thermostat with heat and cooling source(s);  a hygrometer to start up the humidifier or dehumidifier; and reported pollen counts to begin filtering the air or closing the windows.  Yet some people don't like it the same way and the weather within the house varies too - the settings are agreed to by compromise or directed by those with authority - it's never quite right.

So, some of us build houses that are sustainable under all reasonable weather expectations and don't require excessive effort to control them.  The people change the way they dress and behave differently.  They may choose to work in the morning, go to the air-conditioned mall or beach, when it's hot; or even travel during periods of weather that're not to their liking.  They accommodate the weather rather than judging it an attempting to control it.   They might not even have an opinion about the weather and actually appreciate the variation - that sounds good to me.  Yet, I'm going to heat, cool and filter to adjust for the extremes that significantly affect my life - just like I'm going to plan on dressing to fit the forecasted weather.

I choose to be thankful for each day's weather and refuse to judge it as being either good or bad.  I want to live my life accommodating the variation and appreciating it rather than working never-ending cycles of measuring, judging, controlling, and deeming it as either good or bad.  And, I want to treat the people that I interact with, in community, in a similar way.  Engage in their lives and enjoy each other without trying to fix, manage, and control them according to what I expect is best for them.  They won't all be my friends yet I intend to offer grace, mercy, love, and respect to all.

The only church in town will be thankful for the grace, forgiveness, and love that God pours out on us through our Lord Jesus the Christ.  Church people will work out a similar, albeit clunky, graceful heart within their relationships too - mirroring how God loves them.

Just for today...

"Being an adult was looking good on the outside and not feeling what was going on the inside . . . The first thing to go was the control over others - it simply doesn't work  . . .  Today I can risk being myself. I don't have to live up to anyone's image."  Courage to Change (p. 334)

"Today I can put the past where it belongs and focus on taking care of myself. I needn't wait for someone to do it for me."  Hope for Today (p. 334)

"This self-imposed struggle to control the uncontrollable is certainly not rational."  One Day at a Time (p. 334)